Who would have thought cargo shorts would earn such a bad reputation? I’ll be the first to acknowledge that my partner has significantly improved my sense of style. I transitioned from oversized clothing to tailored fits, upgraded my t-shirt collection to more stylish options, and even invested in a few trendy pairs of jeans and shoes. With my partner’s encouragement—and sometimes without my awareness—much of my collegiate wardrobe ended up in the trash or donated. Surprisingly, this fashion overhaul has mostly worked in my favor.
While marriage has its challenges, it has also elevated my “husband material” status. I’m grateful for my partner’s fashion insights, especially since I struggle with color perception. However, everyone has their no-gos. For me, it’s cherished t-shirts, and for many men, it’s cargo shorts. Yet, that hasn’t deterred partners everywhere from waging war against them.
A recent article in the Wall Street Journal claimed cargo shorts are the epitome of fashion faux pas. Women and style experts alike have voiced their disdain for these baggy, pocket-filled garments. Golf courses have banned them, and even Tim Gunn publicly labeled them “the least fashionable” item in his closet (yes, Tim Gunn owns cargo shorts?). One woman lamented, “I loathe them,” admitting she discreetly tosses her husband’s pairs. “There were plenty of great things about the ’90s, but cargo shorts weren’t one of them.”
Let’s be real: the ’90s had its ups and downs, but cargo shorts were actually created for their practicality during WWII. Men don’t carry purses, and often need those extra pockets—especially dads. Though I don’t sport cargo shorts, I know countless fathers who do, using their many pockets to pull out everything from snacks to toys. I’ve yet to see a woman pull anything remotely useful from her yoga pants, and cargo shorts have never sported “JUICY” across the backside. So, let’s cool it, ladies.
Redbook Magazine even published a piece titled “Cargo Shorts Are Ruining Marriages Across America,” but clothing typically doesn’t dismantle relationships. Unless, of course, I caught my partner wearing a Yankees jersey—then we might need therapy.
Another woman from the WSJ piece shared her embarrassment over her partner’s attire, saying, “It reflects on me, like ‘How did she let him leave the house like that?’” If I ever expressed embarrassment over my partner’s clothing or secretly discarded her yoga shorts or one of those endless handbags, we’d be headed for divorce court. It’s essential to respect your partner’s choices rather than undermine them behind their back.
Of course, I’d never discard my partner’s yoga pants—not out of fear, but because I genuinely like them. They look incredibly comfy! If she opts to wear them all day, I’m all for it. Sure, she might want to dress up for a night out, but with two kids, getting dressed just to end up with a handprint on her outfit seems unnecessary. Dads don’t need to dress up either.
Parenting is tough and often messy, necessitating practical attire—like cargo shorts, which may not be the most fashionable, but they get the job done and offer comfort. However, if your partner sports camouflage cargo shorts, that might be a valid reason to contemplate an annulment.
In conclusion, let’s embrace the practicality of cargo shorts while still having fun with fashion. After all, we’re navigating the chaos of parenthood together, one pocketful of supplies at a time. If you’re curious about home insemination methods, check out this insightful article on intrauterine insemination or explore the ultimate home insemination kit for more information.