In recent months, we have witnessed a constant barrage of challenges to women’s reproductive rights. As a woman and a recent beneficiary of those rights, this reality deeply troubles me. The thought that these rights are being undermined is alarming.
So, why do reproductive rights matter so much to me? The answer is simple: I am a mother who underwent a second-trimester abortion.
At the time, my family was living in California, and our son was just two years old. We were excited to welcome another child. After a successful attempt to conceive, we were thrilled to discover I was pregnant. We had passed all the chromosomal tests and felt reassured. Once we crossed the first trimester, we joyfully shared the news with our family—we were expecting another boy! Despite some initial spotting, the first ultrasound looked promising. However, our doctor recommended another ultrasound at 16 weeks just to be thorough. By that time, the spotting had ceased, and I anticipated more good news.
But that was not to be. The ultrasound technician seemed unusually quiet, and when the doctor entered, I felt a sense of dread. Instead of the expected relief, I was met with the words, “I have serious concerns for this pregnancy.” I was overcome with confusion and fear.
The diagnosis was bilateral multicystic dysplastic kidneys—meaning neither of the baby’s kidneys had developed properly; they were just clusters of cysts. As a result, my unborn son wasn’t producing any amniotic fluid. When the doctor explained our options, I was left with a heavy heart: we could terminate the pregnancy, wait and see if it ended naturally, or carry the pregnancy to term and face the likelihood of a stillbirth or a baby who would suffer immensely.
That day, my husband and I made the heart-wrenching decision to end the pregnancy. We chose to have a follow-up ultrasound, which confirmed our worst fears. The deformed kidneys looked like clusters of grapes, and there was no sign of a bladder or stomach. The reality was stark: if the pregnancy continued, our son would not survive, and if he somehow did, he would endure a life of suffering. This was a decision we had to make as parents, and it was our first and last parenting choice for that child.
The days that followed were emotionally exhausting as we waited for a hospital appointment for the D&E procedure. Each time I felt the baby kick, a bittersweet wave of happiness washed over me, only to be replaced by the painful reminder that I would never hold him in my arms.
Amid this turmoil, a doctor told me, “You’re fortunate to live in a state that allows you to make this choice.” It struck me then that in other states, I could have faced even more obstacles or potentially been denied the right to make this decision for my family. The thought of being compelled to carry my son to term—risking my health and emotional well-being—was unbearable. I could imagine the anguish of explaining to my living son why his brother was suffering. The burden of that scenario would have been simply too much to bear.
At 18 weeks, we ended the pregnancy and bid farewell to our son. While I wouldn’t wish the experience of terminating a wanted pregnancy on anyone, I am grateful to have lived in a state that provided a safe and dignified environment for our choice.
That is why reproductive rights hold such significance for me.
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Summary
My experience with reproductive rights in California has shown me their importance firsthand. After learning about a severe medical condition affecting my unborn son, I faced the difficult choice of terminating the pregnancy. The support and options available to me in my state made a challenging situation more bearable, emphasizing the critical nature of reproductive rights for families in similar circumstances.