Parenting
I’ve discovered that always saying “yes” can turn you into a doormat; it doesn’t make you a martyr either. Most people I know who agree to everything are often quite unhappy. Honestly, I couldn’t care less about saying “no” when it comes to my needs or preferences.
Sometimes, it’s just not feasible—or frankly, I simply don’t want to. And that’s perfectly fine. Just because you volunteered to help with an event doesn’t mean you have to take on every single task that comes your way. Before you know it, you could be wearing a fake smile while harboring feelings of resentment toward the very people who think you enjoy it. That’s when I realize it’s time to embrace the power of “no.”
Here are seven instances where I have no problem saying no:
- Intimacy
I adore my partner, but I’m not afraid to gently decline with a “Not tonight, love.” And yes, sometimes I might follow it up with a dramatic eye roll. The guilt? Almost nonexistent. It’s my body, and I have to consent before engaging. After a long day of cleaning and chasing after kids, I might not be in the mood—and that’s okay. - Volunteering
I sometimes say yes, but not always. Volunteering is essential and fulfilling, but it’s also demanding work. I prioritize my energy for my family, and that comes first. - Purchasing for My Kids
My children won’t always have the best of everything, and I refuse to say yes to every request for the latest gadgets or experiences. Learning to work for what they want builds character and appreciation. They may not understand now, but I’m confident they’ll thank me later. If not, I truly don’t care. - Watching Others’ Children
Just because I’m a stay-at-home parent doesn’t mean I’m free to babysit. Sometimes I’m simply too exhausted to take on more kids or have my day disrupted. I love helping when I can, but I won’t hesitate to say no without feeling guilty. - Intrusive Questions
“So, you’re at home? What does your partner do?” No thanks.
“Aren’t you bored?” This conversation is what’s actually dull.
“Are you worried about that blue Popsicle affecting your child later?” Nope. Aren’t you concerned about how your uptight attitude might impact your kids?
“Don’t you think drinking wine in front of them sets a bad example?” Nah, I’m more worried about the state of the world. Also, please, just stop. - Doing Everything with My Kids
While I love spending time with my children, it doesn’t mean I want to participate in every activity. Recently, my partner took the kids camping while I opted out due to exhaustion and deadlines. I felt a bit guilty, but once I snuggled into bed with a good book, that guilt floated away like a butterfly. - Following the Crowd
Just because everyone else is enrolling their kids in a particular summer camp doesn’t mean I will. If my son’s friend gets to play a video game that leaves my child unable to cope with reality, then that’s a hard no. I prioritize what’s best for my family, and sometimes that means saying “no.” Keeping up with trends is tiresome; I focus on what matters most to us.
Moms play a crucial role in shaping the atmosphere of their households. We are significant, and it’s essential to recognize what makes us feel overwhelmed. There’s something liberating about declining without guilt or regret. We must prioritize what keeps our lives running smoothly, even if that means saying “no” more than we say “yes.”
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Summary:
Saying no can be incredibly empowering, especially for parents who often feel pressured to say yes to everything. It’s crucial to prioritize personal well-being and family needs over societal expectations. Remember, it’s perfectly okay to draw boundaries and focus on what truly matters.