As I transitioned from childhood to parenthood, I found myself letting go of some traditional parenting methods while adopting new ones that fit my family’s dynamic. For instance, in our household, there’s no single leader because we’re both too tired, and nobody wants that extra responsibility. Decisions aren’t made by just one person since our family is made up of several voices. Everyone contributes, except for our baby, who is quite literally a baby, and our cats, who are just lazy.
Despite the evolution of parenting styles over the years, there are still moments when old-school methods come into play. We know what’s best for our kids, but sometimes, especially as they grow, we need to allow them to experience failure. If we’re always there to catch them, how will they learn to get back up? (The baby, of course, always gets picked up.)
While our childhood experiences differ from our children’s, I still find value in some traditional parenting approaches, such as:
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I Don’t Play with My Kids.
Just like my parents, who were busy working, I have a lot on my plate. While I enjoy occasional games or crafts, I also rely on my kids to play together. After all, that’s what siblings are for! -
We Don’t Shield Them from Mistakes.
Making choices is part of life. I let my kids pick their ice cream flavors, but if they choose one they don’t like, they have to deal with it. It’s essential they learn to make decisions early on, and we won’t interfere unless it’s potentially dangerous. -
Chores are a Must.
Rather than focusing on allowances, I want my kids to grasp the concept of responsibility. Their chores might be simple now — like picking up toys or feeding the cats — but they’re learning that they must earn privileges. -
We Aren’t Their Friends.
As parents, our role is to guide, not to be their pals. We spend time together and provide support, but ultimately, our relationship is based on responsibility and respect until they reach adulthood. -
No Quitting Allowed.
When my kids commit to something, they need to see it through. Whether it’s an activity or a simple task, they must finish what they start. -
Own Your Actions.
Mistakes are part of life, and it’s crucial to accept when you’re wrong. I model this behavior, so my kids know that apologizing and learning from errors is important. -
Consistency is Key.
If I set a rule, I follow through. For example, if I say they’ll go to bed for fighting, then that’s what happens. Life has consequences, and they need to learn that early. -
Encouraging Independence.
While I love their little moments of needing me, I also encourage my kids to do things for themselves, like getting dressed or brushing their teeth. It’s about preparing them for the future. -
I Stay Out of Arguments.
Conflict resolution is a skill they need to learn. I won’t always be there to mediate; they need to work things out on their own, unless it’s a serious issue. -
Respect for Others.
We teach our kids to appreciate differences in people. Respecting others opens doors to new opportunities and friendships. -
Family Time is Sacred.
We prioritize shared moments, like dinner without distractions and special outings. These traditions help us connect and understand each other better. -
Valuing Hard Work.
It’s easy to give kids what they want, but they need to learn the satisfaction that comes from earning it. Life requires effort, and understanding this is vital for their growth.
Regardless of whether you embrace old-school, new-school, or any other style, what truly matters is your dedication to nurturing your children. They need to learn that life has rules, responsibilities, and that everyone must contribute — except for the lazy cats, of course.
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In summary, the blend of old-school principles with a modern approach can create a nurturing environment for children, guiding them as they prepare for the future.