Before I embarked on the journey of parenthood, I would visit the homes of friends and relatives with children, marveling at the chaos that surrounded them. Even in the tidiest of homes, the signs of destruction were evident — sagging couch springs, cabinet doors slightly askew, and dining tables marked with fork impressions. I assumed these parents simply had unruly kids or were too laid-back in their approach.
Then I welcomed my own little ones into the world and quickly discovered that you can be a diligent parent with well-behaved children, and still experience the devastation of your belongings. It turns out that kids don’t just break things; they transform them into unrecognizable chaos.
Their Toys
Our children haven’t necessarily shattered their toys; rather, they’ve rendered them utterly unusable for anyone else. Between scribbling their backward-named signatures with permanent markers, giving their dolls questionable makeovers that involve haircuts and mysterious face paint (seriously, how do they always find a Sharpie?), and losing countless pieces of multi-part games, it’s become nearly impossible to pass down any toys beyond our family since our eldest turned two.
Our Walls
With three kids in the house, we’ve encountered at least one aspiring wall artist — and honestly, that’s a decent ratio. However, they’ve all left their mark in other ways. Have you ever examined your walls closely? It’s a terrifying experience. Besides the unidentifiable smudges and what I hope is not chocolate, I occasionally find footprints on the wall. Are my children superheroes? Because it sure seems like they think they have the power to walk on walls!
My Definition of “Clean”
Speaking of those dirty walls, my concept of cleanliness has definitely taken a hit since becoming a parent. As for the house, I gave up on trying to keep the glass free of handprints years ago. Dust? What dust? It’s practically non-existent on my radar now. And when it comes to my children, as long as they don’t smell and seem relatively clean, I consider them good to go. Did you bathe this week? You think so? Close enough!
My Patience
People often say that parenting teaches patience, but I suspect they’re indulging in wishful thinking. I was far more patient before I had kids! Perhaps it’s that my patience is tested so frequently that I’m hyper-aware of it now or that my nerves feel frayed after hearing “Mom, Mom, Mom” shouted like a broken record for over a decade. That could be it!
My Ability to Watch the News
First off, young children shouldn’t be exposed to all the grim realities of the world. Secondly, I can’t handle it. The news is a barrage of tragic events and serves as a constant reminder that I’ve brought my kids into a world that seems to be falling apart. Why would I voluntarily subject myself to that?
My Ideal of Perfect Parenting
This one really needs no further explanation. Just, bwaahaaahaahaaaa!
My Heart
Oh, my heart. It feels like a daily explosion of love, joy, worry, and pain. I navigate life with an internal eruption happening all the time. The love I have for these children stretches my heart to its limits. The joy from their laughter, accomplishments, or when they snuggle into me is overwhelming. Yet, the anxiety about their safety and my own shortcomings can rattle me like an earthquake. Watching them face tough lessons and heartaches as they grow up feels like a physical ache. It’s astonishing how my heart continues to function amidst it all.
Yes, kids do create chaos. But honestly, not everything they ruin needs to remain pristine. I’m grateful for my illusions being shattered and my heart being opened wide every day. The walls? They can be cleaned. The toys? They were cherished. My patience? I would love to reclaim that, but that’s largely on me. And as for the news? Most of it is just noise anyway.
So, go ahead, little wrecking balls! We’ll mend what needs mending and embrace the beautiful messiness of parenthood. For more insights into this journey, check out this blog post or explore the great resources available at CCRM IVF. If you’re considering starting a family, be sure to visit Make A Mom for insights on boosting fertility.
Summary
Parenthood can be a whirlwind of chaos, with children leaving their mark on everything from toys to walls. The concept of “clean” changes dramatically, and patience is continuously tested. Yet, amid the mess, there’s profound joy and love. Embracing the imperfections of parenting allows us to appreciate the journey fully.