As the days grow colder, it’s that delightful time of year again—hot cocoa, cozy sweaters, and twinkling lights fill the air. However, my sons seem to think we’re enjoying a tropical vacation instead of facing the brisk chill of winter, choosing shorts and t-shirts even when there’s snow on the ground.
Honestly, I can’t wrap my head around it. After over 40 years on this planet and more than a decade of parenting, I realize there are some mysteries I will never solve. For instance, quantum physics baffles me, and Common Core math? Forget it. I’ll never comprehend why my kids enjoy watching videos of people unboxing toys or why staying up late makes them rise early. But perhaps the greatest enigma is why my tween and teen boys insist on dressing for summer in the dead of winter.
Despite the freezing temperatures, they refuse to wear coats. To be fair, they rarely complain about the cold, probably having learned that a simple shiver in my presence may lead to a stern look. I’ve stopped nagging them about dressing suitably for the weather. If they get cold, they’ll eventually reach for warmer clothes, right? Well, in theory. These strong-willed kids would rather brave the cold than admit I was right about needing hats and gloves.
But honestly, it’s not their choice of clothing that frustrates me; it’s the unsolicited comments from others. No, grocery store clerk, my son won’t catch a cold because he’s coatless. That’s just not how it works. If he gets sick, it’s likely from the germ-infested classroom he spends all day in. Yes, Aunt Clara, I do buy them coats and gloves—they just choose not to wear them. I’m letting them face the natural consequences (being uncomfortably cold) in hopes of teaching them a lesson.
And to the stranger on the street, no, I can’t force my son to wear a coat—he’s nearly as tall as I am! It would be impossible to shove his arms into a coat, and even if I could, I wouldn’t. Body autonomy is important.
One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned in parenting is the importance of picking battles. This isn’t one I’m willing to fight. So here we are, in the mid-30s with frost on the ground and snow in the forecast, while my boys roam about in their summer attire—while I resist the urge to tell them to put on some proper clothes.
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In summary, I’ve embraced the reality that my kids will dress as they please, regardless of the weather. While I’ve relinquished control over their outerwear choices, I hope that the natural consequences of their decisions will eventually guide them toward better choices in the future.