Your cart is currently empty!
Choosing Kindness Over Convenience During the Holidays
For years, that person begging on the street corner has been a source of unease for me. You see, they remind me of my own failings when it comes to generosity. And even worse, I worry I’m instilling similar values in my children.
Of course, I don’t intend to be insincere. Who truly wants to be anything but charitable with their time, feelings, and resources? Yet, when confronted with someone in dire need, I often turn away, convincing myself that I’m justified in my inaction. Sure, some panhandlers may not be genuine, but it’s hard to believe that anyone would resort to begging if they had better options.
A few years back, my kids and I found ourselves downtown, an uncommon outing for us, when my daughter, then 5, exclaimed, “Mommy, is that Santa?” She lit up with excitement, and I turned to see what caught her attention. It was summertime, so I doubted Santa would be out and about, but stranger things have happened.
The man she mistook for Santa had a long, scraggly beard, but that was where the similarities ended. He was tall and thin, not the jolly figure one might expect. His shirt was unkempt, and he held a cardboard sign asking for help. In a moment of weakness, I quickly shut my eyes and turned away from “Santa.”
My daughter kept peppering me with questions: “What does his sign say?” “Can we help him?” “Why are we leaving?” Kids have a knack for cutting through the emotional fog, don’t they? I hurried past him, hoping to shield myself and my children from an awkward conversation.
As we walked to our car, I planned to discuss the situation with my kids later, but I soon realized that I didn’t know what to say. What could I possibly explain about homelessness to a 5- and 7-year-old? So, I said nothing, hoping they wouldn’t bring it up again. We drove home, listening to upbeat music, as if the encounter hadn’t happened. It was easier to indulge in treats from Starbucks than to confront someone else’s suffering.
I like to think of myself as a kind person, and while I do contribute in some ways, the truth is that my generosity has its limits. My husband often argues that panhandlers are part of a larger scheme, and I find myself torn between wanting to help and craving the security of my comfortable life. It’s a struggle, and more often than not, I choose my own comfort over charity.
Every year, my family engages in a few charitable activities that make us feel like we’re making a difference. We sponsor children at a local school during Christmas and support a child living in an orphanage in Kenya. But I’ve come to recognize that when it comes to directly helping those in need, I often look away. I feel guilty, but I still hesitate.
With approximately 550,000 homeless individuals in the United States as of early 2023, I can no longer afford to ignore their plight. It’s time for me to take action. The next time I see someone in need, I plan to offer them a few dollars, wish them happy holidays, and show my children that true kindness doesn’t come with conditions.
This article was originally published on Dec. 16, 2023. For more insights and personal stories, check out our other blogs, such as this one on terms and conditions. If you’re interested in starting your own family journey, visit Make a Mom for resources on home insemination kits.
Summary
This piece reflects on the author’s struggle with giving to those in need during the holidays. It highlights moments of hesitation and guilt in the face of homelessness, ultimately leading to a commitment to act more charitably. The author recognizes the importance of teaching their children the value of unconditional kindness.