So, you’re interested in becoming my mom friend? Fantastic! While I’d love to join you on a cheerful stroll through the aisles of Target, I’ve had my share of experiences—some not so pleasant. From drama to an unfortunate incident involving one child assaulting mine with a rock, I’ve learned that we need to establish some ground rules before we dive into this friendship. I’m busy enough as it is, juggling laundry and the endless energy demands of little ones who seem to think it’s fun to remove their clothes.
Do You Respect My Parenting Choices?
I identify as an attachment parent, and I sincerely don’t mind if you choose to formula-feed or let your baby cry it out. We’ve both made informed decisions based on our own research. Even if we disagree, it’s crucial that we respect each other’s choices. I’m not interested in passive-aggressive comments that suggest otherwise. I need friends who can accept differences without drama.
Are Our Kids Around the Same Age, and Are They Reasonably Well-Behaved?
Friendship is easier when our kids get along! It allows us to enjoy our coffee while they entertain themselves (and wreak mild havoc) nearby. Ideally, we want to avoid any mini-monsters or bullies in the mix.
Are You Aware of the Savage Nature of Young Kids?
Children can be little savages—they’ll hit, scratch, and bite without a second thought. If you’re not prepared for the reality of toddler roughhousing, we may not be the right match. Learning to laugh off these incidents is essential.
Do You Strive for a Drama-Free Life?
I’m all about eliminating unnecessary drama. This means no gossiping or passive-aggressive posts on social media. I simply don’t have the bandwidth for that nonsense. If you’re looking to vent about other people, I’m not your gal.
Are You Easily Grossed Out?
Let’s talk about the realities of parenting, including snot, poop, and all the messy details. This includes everything from postpartum experiences to discussions about menstruation. If you’re squeamish, our friendship might be challenging.
Do You Have Political Opinions?
It’s great if our views align, but it’s also okay if they don’t. What matters is that you have thought-out opinions and can respect mine. A basic understanding of current events would be a bonus.
Can We Talk About Stuff Beyond Parenting?
While we definitely need to have our share of discussions about poop, it’s equally important to talk about other topics—like current events, fashion, and recipes. If you’re solely focused on baby talk, you might want to seek a different friend. I crave a balance of parenting chatter and adult conversation.
Are You Up for Some Target Runs?
Of course, you are!
Things I Don’t Care About (and Don’t Expect You to, Either):
- Whether your laundry is done
- How clean your house is (unless it’s a health hazard)
- Your parenting methods
- Your age
- Whether you’re a stay-at-home or working parent, as long as you appreciate a good Target run
- Your sexual orientation
If you’ve made it through this informal interview, congratulations! Let’s hit up Starbucks and celebrate this new friendship. And if you’re looking for more insightful reads, check out our article about home insemination techniques here. For a deeper dive into artificial insemination options, visit Make a Mom. If you’re interested in the IVF process, this resource is excellent for understanding what to expect.
Summary:
Forming friendships with fellow moms can be incredibly rewarding, but it’s important to set clear expectations from the start. Respect for each other’s parenting choices, a shared understanding of child behavior, and a mutual desire for drama-free conversations will lay a solid foundation for a lasting friendship. By engaging in meaningful discussions beyond just parenting, we can enrich our lives and support each other through the ups and downs of motherhood.