10 Habits I Gave Up to Enhance My Happiness

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The thought of escaping to a remote Caribbean island sounds appealing, but let’s be real—my kids would find me. It’s as though they come equipped with an innate GPS designed to locate their parents, while conveniently ignoring the location of their missing toys and shoes. Parenting often brings an unavoidable sense of overwhelm, which I’ve experienced firsthand over the past few years. In my quest for a more manageable life, I decided to narrow down my responsibilities and eliminate a few unproductive habits. Here’s what I quit to find more joy:

  1. Complaining
    I realized that venting rarely changes a situation for the better. For instance, when my partner is knee-deep in a plumbing fiasco, grumbling about getting soaked doesn’t help. Instead, I’ve focused on practical solutions—like grabbing towels. Though I find it challenging to stop my habit of complaining, I’m slowly learning that it only adds to my stress.
  2. Holding Expectations
    Life has shown me that expectations often lead to disappointment. By relinquishing the need for others (including myself) to meet certain standards, I’ve reduced my stress levels significantly. I still ask for help and express gratitude, but I no longer hinge my happiness on what others do.
  3. Worrying About the Uncontrollable
    As a creature of habit, it’s tough when kids disrupt my routines. I used to fret about getting off schedule, which only exacerbated my stress. Accepting that I cannot control everything has been both challenging and liberating.
  4. Being My Own Harshest Critic
    I tend to set impossibly high standards for myself, juggling numerous responsibilities. In truth, I’m the only one holding myself to these expectations. Realizing I don’t have to have everything perfect has been a relief and a source of happiness.
  5. Overcommitting to Activities
    My daughter’s extracurriculars became overwhelming, especially with the start of kindergarten. Once she began crying from the stress of juggling dance, gymnastics, and Girl Scouts, I knew it was time to reassess. We decided to focus on one activity—Girl Scouts—and it’s worked wonders for both of us.
  6. Weekend Laundry
    Instead of drowning in laundry on weekends, I switched to a more manageable routine of doing one load per day during the week. This simple change has lifted the pressure and made my life easier.
  7. Dishes on Weekends
    I used to be adamant about keeping the sink empty at all times. However, I’ve given myself permission to take breaks. Allowing a few dirty dishes to pile up on Friday and Saturday nights has been liberating, even if it makes my kitchen look chaotic.
  8. Constant Cleaning
    I’ve come to realize that no one in my household cares if everything is spotless, so why should I? I’ve stopped following behind everyone to pick up after them. Instead, I focus on enjoying our time together.
  9. Excessive Internet Use
    While the Internet is a great escape, I found myself getting lost in it. I could be researching fascinating topics instead of cleaning, but that often led to wasted hours. Now, I limit my online time, allowing me to be more present with my family and myself.
  10. Arguing About Exhaustion
    My partner and I often found ourselves in a tiredness competition. Instead of debating whose day was harder, I shifted the conversation to neutral topics or the kids, allowing us both to unwind and connect without the negativity.

Parenting is no walk in the park, and figuring out how to manage the chaos can feel overwhelming. But identifying and avoiding the traps that stress me out has made my daily life much more enjoyable. If you’re feeling the weight of parenting, know that it’s okay to acknowledge those feelings and find strategies that work for you—even if it means hiding away for a moment (just remember, they’ll always find you).

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