The title of this piece might raise a few eyebrows, even from my partner, Jake. He might be thinking, “Mia? She puts me first?” But, dear Jake, I genuinely strive to prioritize you, even if that isn’t always evident.
Love is an immeasurable force; it cannot be ranked or quantified. My parents hold a special place in my heart for their unwavering support throughout my life. My brother, who I’ve seen grow and evolve, is equally cherished. Jake is the individual I chose to share my life with, while my children were a beautiful blessing bestowed upon me by fate. My affection for each of them is profound and equal.
However, life requires us to make choices, and we cannot do everything simultaneously. Thus, I adhere to the philosophy of placing my partner before my children. Many who know me well, including Jake, might assume my love for my kids surpasses my love for him. But the truth is, I hold them all in the same regard, and I believe it’s essential to prioritize my husband.
To my future adult children, I hope you understand my perspective. Know that our entire family — each one of you — is immensely important to me. Here are several compelling reasons supporting my belief in prioritizing my partner:
1. We Chose Each Other
Among all the relationships in my life, I consciously selected Jake to be my lifelong companion. He deserves to be my priority, even after our children arrive. It’s essential to remember not to take him for granted and to continuously express the love I have for him — he was my first choice.
2. No One Else Will Prioritize Us
If we don’t prioritize each other, who will? We made a commitment to support one another through every circumstance. Jake often places others before himself, a quality I admire yet also recognize can lead to neglect of his own needs. It’s my responsibility to ensure he feels valued and cared for.
3. We Are the Foundation for Our Children
My ultimate aspiration is to cultivate a joyful family, where happiness takes precedence over material wealth. A harmonious family unit encompasses Jake, myself, and our children. If I prioritize the kids, Jake may feel undervalued, which can strain our marriage. A strong partnership fosters a happy family environment, benefiting everyone involved.
4. Fostering Empathy in Our Children
As the first generation of parents to focus intensely on our kids’ needs, it’s easy for children to develop a sense of entitlement. We want our children to understand that while their needs matter, there are times when others come first. This understanding fosters a sense of community and respect for others.
5. Teaching Future Generations
Our children observe our relationship closely, learning what a healthy marriage looks like. It’s vital for them to understand the importance of prioritizing a spouse, ensuring they can build their own happy families one day. This knowledge strengthens family bonds.
6. Preparing for the Future
Eventually, our children will grow up and embark on their individual paths. It’s crucial to maintain the connection between Jake and me, so we don’t find ourselves drifting apart once the children have left home. Keeping our love alive now is essential for our future together.
Prioritizing my partner does not mean my children will be neglected. I understand your concerns if you think this approach is misguided. My intention is to consider Jake’s feelings alongside those of our children in every decision we make, ensuring that no one is overlooked.
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In summary, my commitment to prioritizing my husband does not diminish my love for my children. Instead, it strengthens our family unit, fostering an environment of respect, love, and understanding.