Dear Plus-Size Woman on Vacation,
You radiated beauty in your colorful top and styled hair. As you and your partner took the stage for a couples’ contest, it was clear that you exuded joy and confidence. Your presence among the crowd of onlookers showcased your vibrant personality, defying the societal expectations that often push women of size into the background.
I was thrilled to watch you shine in whatever contest you were part of. As an introspective person, I felt a pang of envy at your ease on stage. When the emcee announced a dance competition, I could see your excitement. Perhaps you and your partner had taken dance classes, or maybe you simply enjoyed Zumba. Your playful exchange with him, complete with a smile and a glint in your eye, revealed your ownership of that stage.
Then, the announcement came that the husbands would need to lift their wives at the end of the dance. My heart sank. I couldn’t shake the feeling that this was inherently unfair. Why were you chosen for this competition? Would they have invited someone with a physical disability to participate in a dance? Why was it acceptable to subject you to potential humiliation in front of an audience?
My concerns were soon validated. When you learned that a lift was required, a brief, uncomfortable smile crossed your face, hinting at your internal struggle. Would you retreat to your room for the rest of your vacation? Sit back in the audience under the weight of judgment? Maintain your smile and hope for the best? Or perhaps take the mic and express your displeasure?
You attempted to leave the stage, but the entertainment staff pulled you back with cheerful insistence. Complying was your only option to avoid a scene and further humiliation. My heart raced as I wished I could intervene, to whisk you away to a private spot where we could sip Piña Coladas and swap stories about navigating the cruel realities of our experiences.
As the couples took their turns, each effortlessly lifted and met with applause, I couldn’t help but feel for you. I knew you had never been lifted with ease, just as I hadn’t.
When it was finally your turn, I saw the nervousness etched on your face, while your partner looked at you with empathy. You whispered to one another, and then, with a genuine smile, you seemed to devise a plan to turn the situation around. As the music started, you both danced with laughter and abandon, and I felt a sense of relief.
But then the moment of truth arrived. As the music faded, I noticed movement from the entertainment staff. You raised your hand, but they disregarded your signal. Without regard for your consent, they lifted you as they had the other women—except it required four men to raise you. Your emotions shifted from fear to anger, resignation, and ultimately sadness. The crowd erupted in laughter. The men took a bow and left you standing there, stunned, as if you were merely part of the show.
Did you recognize that you had unwittingly become the evening’s entertainment? This routine was clearly a well-rehearsed act, with new guests each week to serve as the punchline. Why is it acceptable to make women like us the target of jokes? Why must we endure these moments and laugh along?
Throughout the rest of the competition, your eyes seemed vacant, and your smile was weary. The audience voted, and you received the most applause. I wondered if it stemmed from sympathy for your humiliation or if they genuinely found your lift the funniest. I didn’t clap; I was filled with anger. I felt rage not just for you but for all of us who have been subjected to such treatment.
Dear Plus-Size Woman on the Stage, you embody all of us. Society has yet to embrace the diversity of body sizes. You’ve been blamed and ridiculed for your weight, but offered no genuine solutions. From childhood, you may have felt like a perpetual project, constantly judged for a body that is strong and healthy. The relentless cycle of dieting and societal pressure can lead to further weight gain and emotional turmoil. You’ve been the punchline, with your weight overshadowing your true self.
However, when I first saw you on that stage, I recognized a woman who refused to shrink. You took up space, embracing a love that sees you for more than just your appearance. I could feel the bond between you and your partner—a testament to the support you share. The path to self-acceptance is not straightforward; it’s filled with ups and downs. Though this incident dimmed your light that night, I sensed you’d find a way to reignite it.
Even though I didn’t see you afterward, I couldn’t stop thinking about you, realizing how much we share. I hope you took time to heal and that by morning, you recognized your worth and decided to savor your vacation. I imagine you by the pool with a Piña Colada, laughing and soaking up the sun. You’re probably the first to join the Zumba class, showing everyone how it’s done.
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Summary
This letter reflects on a woman’s experience at a vacation event where she was subjected to humiliation during a dance competition. It explores the societal pressures and biases faced by plus-size individuals, emphasizing the importance of self-acceptance and resilience.