We are strangers, and I am simply navigating my day in a public space. You approached me—a complete stranger—and felt entitled to say, “Smile. You’re too beautiful not to be smiling.”
You likely perceived this as a compliment since you referred to my beauty. However, when I recoiled instead of smiling, it probably felt like a rejection to you. In reality, I was merely attempting to manage my daily routine.
You know nothing about me. You are unaware that interactions with unfamiliar people trigger my anxiety, complicating my day more than necessary. Honestly, you have no right to know these personal details because we are not acquainted. We are merely two people in the same vicinity at that moment.
Women being out in public does not grant you the authority to impose expectations or dictate their behavior to suit your preferences. That notion is utterly absurd. You wouldn’t dare approach another man in the same way; you would allow him to act as he pleases. Yet, because I’m deemed “beautiful,” you felt it was your duty to correct my demeanor.
You are not the first man to demand that I smile, and I’m certain you won’t be the last. The audacity required to make such a demand is both infuriating and frightening, but sadly, it is all too common.
Here’s something you may not realize about being a woman: it often feels like an open invitation for unsolicited comments, interruptions, and demands on my attention. It can lead to unwelcome stares, unwanted followings to my car, and persistent requests for contact information, even after I’ve clearly declined. If I reject these advances, I might be labeled as stuck-up or ungrateful, as if my disinterest is an affront to your ego.
Another stark reality of being female is that it can be dangerous. The man who tells me to smile in the store could just as easily become the man who follows me to my car. He could be the one who reacts violently when I refuse his advances. The uncertainty instills a perpetual sense of vigilance; it’s safer to be cautious than to risk an encounter that could escalate.
When I am out in public, I am constantly aware of my surroundings. I evaluate the men nearby, assessing their behavior. Are they too attentive? Have I noticed them lingering too long? My mind races with thoughts of potential dangers, planning for worst-case scenarios, anxious to avoid any confrontation.
This is the reality of being female in public spaces.
Let me clarify one crucial point: my expression in public is not yours to dictate. I am not obligated to smile; I owe you nothing at all. Take a moment to understand this. If I am grocery shopping or browsing at the library, sharing the same space does not grant you permission to impose your will on my demeanor. I could be dealing with personal struggles or simply not in the mood to smile. It doesn’t matter. Mind your own business and allow me to do the same.
This post aims to shed light on the complexities of female experiences in public, particularly regarding unsolicited interactions. For those interested in fertility and home insemination, you can find valuable insights in this excellent resource about what to expect during your first IUI.
In summary, unsolicited comments from strangers can often lead to discomfort and anxiety for women. It’s essential to recognize the complexities of these interactions and respect personal boundaries.