In today’s fast-paced digital world, my reliance on my smartphone has become a significant part of my daily routine. Balancing a demanding job that spans from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. with managing a blog that boasts several hundred thousand followers has left me tethered to my device. Whether I’m responding to colleagues or working on my blog, my phone often keeps me from fully engaging with my family during precious moments together.
While I appreciate the flexibility my phone affords, it often means I’m only partially present at home. I find myself giving my children half-hearted responses while distracted, missing out on genuine interactions. This is starkly evident during family dinners, where my partner, Sara, frequently catches me sneaking glances at my phone, much like a student trying to covertly check social media in class. (Do kids even use Twitter these days? Maybe it’s all about TikTok now.)
Despite my assumptions that I’m being discreet, Sara is always aware of my distractions. She reacts strongly, reminding me that my behavior is far from acceptable. I’ve even received warnings about the drastic measures she might take to rid me of my phone if I don’t pay attention. I know I need to do better, yet the struggle to set it aside is real. To be fair, she’s not entirely blameless either; there have been times when her focus on her game has led her to agree to our children’s demands without really listening.
Reflecting on our habits, I’d rate my phone addiction as a solid 10, while she might be closer to a 6. This issue of phone addiction isn’t unique to us; many parents find themselves in similar situations. A visit to the park reveals children playing while the majority of parents stare at their screens, a scene repeated at sporting events and dance classes. I’m not judging; I’m right there with you.
Interestingly, my former therapist also suggested cutting back on phone use—not for family reasons, but due to the negative impact on my mental health. She pointed out that excessive social media can contribute to feelings of anxiety and depression.
Recognizing the need for change, I’ve decided to make a conscious effort to reduce my phone use. While I can’t eliminate it entirely due to work obligations, I intend to leave it in the bedroom during dinner, pocket it while at the playground, and shut it off during family activities like watching shows with my daughters or attending my son’s soccer matches. By minimizing distractions, I hope to foster more patience and engagement with my children. If I were to look back on my life years from now, I wouldn’t want to see a series of moments where my focus was diverted by my phone while my kids craved my attention.
I anticipate that some readers may boast about their lack of smartphones or social media, living a lifestyle reminiscent of the 19th century. That’s great for them, but for me, my phone is a cherished tool. However, it’s time to find a healthier balance, allowing me to savor these fleeting moments with my family.
If you relate to this struggle, I encourage you to join me in setting the phone aside. Identify specific times—like meals, bedtime, and playtime—to put your device in another room or turn it off entirely. It doesn’t have to be drastic; even a small change can lead to meaningful connections.
For more insights on family life and parenting, you can check out our other blog posts, including those on terms and conditions and resources on pregnancy. If you’re interested in enhancing your fertility journey, Make a Mom provides valuable information as well.
Summary:
My excessive phone use has impacted my family life, making me realize the need to be more present. By committing to unplug during key moments, I aim to enhance my engagement with my children and strengthen our family connections.