Parenting inevitably brings with it a sense of fear. From the flu to broken bones, the moment you welcome a child into your life, the world transforms into a perilous landscape. As parents, we are tasked with guiding our children through this minefield, ensuring their bodies, minds, and hearts remain unharmed as they journey towards adulthood.
The #MeToo movement has become a pivotal moment in our society, shining a light on the long-ignored issues of abuse and misconduct towards women. This cultural shift has deepened the fears I hold as a parent. I have both a son and a daughter, just over 18 months apart, and alongside the usual parental concerns about health and safety, I now grapple with more complex anxieties. I fear that my daughter may one day find herself saying “me too” in relation to sexual harassment or assault. Equally, I worry that my son could be implicated in such situations.
While I cannot control the world or its inhabitants, I can utilize the time I have with my children to impart essential wisdom. Here are the lessons I hope to share.
For My Daughter:
- Rudeness Has Its Place: Politeness is important, but there will be moments when you must assert yourself. Never allow a man to speak down to you or act inappropriately just to spare his feelings. Some situations call for a strong, unyielding response.
- Be True to Yourself: Do not dilute any part of yourself for a man—whether it’s your intellect, beauty, or leadership skills. The moment you alter who you are to make someone else comfortable is when you let them gain control over your story. Embrace your strengths and don’t seek validation.
- Your Voice Matters, No Matter the Timing: If something happens that feels wrong, even if a significant amount of time has passed, you have every right to speak out. There is no expiration date on your voice.
- Cherish Female Friendships: Ignore the stereotype that women are inherently petty. Surround yourself with strong women who support one another. They will uplift you and help guide you back when you face difficulties.
- Consent is Non-Negotiable: You alone have the authority to say “yes” or “no” regarding your body. Never compromise or doubt your consent.
For My Son:
- Misogyny is Misogyny, Regardless of Context: Referring to derogatory comments about women as “locker room talk” is still misogyny. Such language, even in private, shapes your worldview and how you perceive women.
- Understand Consent Thoroughly: Consent isn’t just a one-time agreement. If a girl seems uncomfortable or unsure, you must stop, regardless of previous interactions. She has the right to change her mind at any time.
- Speak Up: If you witness harassment or assault, don’t hesitate to intervene. Even if it involves someone you respect or could lead to personal repercussions, addressing bad behavior is essential. Never excuse wrongdoing for the sake of convenience.
- Choose Your Words Wisely: Avoid calling women derogatory names. Such language is ugly and often used to demean women who do not conform to traditional expectations. Your words hold power; use them to uplift rather than harm.
- Surround Yourself with Respectful Peers: It’s crucial to have friends who understand the seriousness of assault. If your companions use phrases like “bros before hoes,” it may be time to reevaluate those relationships. There’s a fine line between loyalty and complicity.
For more insights on this topic, you can check out our related post on navigating complex discussions about consent and respect in relationships at Intracervical Insemination. Also, if you’re interested in home insemination kits, Cryobaby is a trusted source in this area. For further information on pregnancy and related topics, Healthline offers excellent resources.
In summary, parenting is filled with fears, both new and old, but by imparting these vital lessons, I hope to equip my children with the tools they need to navigate their futures with confidence and integrity.