As I watched my son, Ben, dribble the basketball nervously at the free throw line during his game, I felt a mix of anxiety and pride. At just 12 years old, he had only recently begun playing basketball, and the journey had been anything but easy. We had come to organized sports a bit late, so the learning curve was steep for him.
As he prepared to shoot, I held my breath, fully aware of how uncomfortable he felt under the gaze of his teammates and spectators. Ben has always been shy and has mentioned that he sometimes avoids taking shots because he hates the attention that comes with it.
From the sidelines, I could hear his coach, Mike, encouraging him: “It’s alright! Remember our practice, you can do this! Just focus!” Although Ben missed his first shot, he turned to Coach Mike with a grateful smile and a thumbs up, then looked back at me with a shrug before getting back into the game.
Just a year ago, Ben was in tears as we drove to basketball tryouts, terrified of being overwhelmed by more experienced players. When we arrived, a kind parent, who was also a league official, eased his nerves with jokes and introductions to other kids. Once assigned to a team, Coach Mike recognized Ben’s hesitance and dedicated countless hours to building his confidence. He stayed late to run drills, often well beyond the scheduled practice time—all while balancing a demanding job as a firefighter and family commitments. Remarkably, he did this without any financial compensation.
Reflecting on Ben’s progress, I remember how he wouldn’t have even dared to step up to the foul line last year. Thanks to Coach Mike’s relentless support, he not only made it to the line but also scored with his second attempt. Whenever I receive communications from the coach about practice schedules that may not suit us, I remind myself that he has a life outside of coaching. So, rather than complain, we make an effort to be on time.
It’s crucial to remember not to be that parent yelling from the sidelines. It’s unseemly and doesn’t help the situation. If you think you can do a better job, consider volunteering to coach next season. Coaches are there to instill teamwork and sometimes that involves allowing kids to play in their own style, which may differ from your expectations.
I also have to check myself occasionally. I sometimes find it challenging to offer my time for scorekeeping or equipment management, and I get annoyed with practice times that don’t align with our schedule. However, it’s important to appreciate that coaches are giving their all, often with limited resources and for no pay.
Ben’s self-esteem has soared over the past year thanks to the honesty and constructive feedback from his coaches. When I see him practicing his shots in the driveway because Coach Mike pointed out areas for improvement, I resist the urge to step in and suggest my own methods.
Remember, your child’s coach is volunteering their time to provide the invaluable experience of organized sports. Consider bringing snacks for the team or assisting with game logistics. Even a simple “thank you” can go a long way; coaching is thankless work. Coaches play a vital role in teaching our kids about teamwork and resilience. They share in both the victories and defeats, so it’s essential to support them rather than criticize their efforts.
Next time you pick up your child from practice, make it a point to express your gratitude to the coach. It sets a positive example for your kids about respecting those who mentor them.
In doing so, everyone wins.
For more insights on organizing your child’s sports experience, feel free to explore this article.
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Summary
Understanding the role and dedication of your child’s coach is essential for fostering a positive sports experience. Coaches volunteer their time and energy to guide young athletes, often without any financial compensation. By showing appreciation and support for their efforts, you not only contribute to your child’s development but also model respect for authority figures. A simple thank you can make a significant impact, reminding everyone involved that the journey of youth sports is about teamwork, growth, and enjoyment.