I own around five bikinis—not because I believe I look fabulous in them, but rather because I find them much more comfortable than one-piece swimsuits. Those tend to ride up uncomfortably and never provide the bust support I desire. As a result, after a day at the beach, I often end up with a sore back, irritation, and a sour mood.
Wearing a bikini also allows for a quick adjustment when wading into the ocean, making it easier to shake off sand after building castles with the kids. In my teenage years and even in my pre-motherhood days, you wouldn’t catch me in a bikini unless I was sunbathing alone, hidden behind a large structure where passersby wouldn’t see me.
While one-pieces may conceal more of my perceived imperfections, I’ve come to appreciate this newfound self-confidence that emerged as I entered my 40s. I didn’t see it coming, but it turned out to be one of the greatest gifts of this decade. Now, I celebrate this by purchasing bikinis I admire—without the hassle of trying them on, because who really wants to endure that?
My younger self anticipated that turning 40 would mean a trip to the plastic surgeon for lifts and fillers. I thought I would be chasing after youth with Botox in every possible area. However, that’s not how my journey unfolded. I’ve reached a stage in my life where my appearance isn’t my main concern, which is why I don’t fret over gray hair, fine lines, or the fact that my backside has sagged a couple of inches.
Interestingly, this newfound confidence allows women to dismiss negativity and recognize the importance of genuine relationships and comfortable clothing over superficial appearances. The realization that their breasts may not be as perky as they once were becomes trivial compared to what truly matters.
Arriving at this stage in life feels exhilarating—an age I once thought would invoke dread every time I glimpsed my reflection. Instead, I feel more vibrant than ever. Women who have navigated through four decades can detect nonsense from a distance and are adept at preventing unwanted stress in their lives.
They no longer prioritize others’ happiness at the expense of their own values, having learned the hard way that compromising leads to dissatisfaction. Saying no becomes an empowering act, as does rejecting superficiality, toxicity, or a swimsuit that causes discomfort.
Most of us have experienced fake friendships, mediocre food, and insincere moments enough times to recognize the value of authenticity. We’d prefer solitude over settling for less, which in turn radiates a beautiful inner glow. Ultimately, the decision to honor oneself is the new allure.
It’s amusing to reflect on my childhood when I instinctively embraced my true self—until I learned to stifle that voice that made me laugh too loudly or speak my mind. I became consumed with worrying about appearances and how I compared to others, allowing external opinions to dictate my emotions for far too long.
Women’s resilience can be diminished, but when we rediscover our authentic selves, we realize how much we’ve longed for that connection. Transitioning back to honoring oneself and breaking free from societal boxes is a liberating experience.
Discussing this newfound confidence in our 40s with friends has often left us astonished; we once believed these years would signal the end of fun. How wrong we were! The celebration of life is just beginning, and I’m grateful to have retained the right amount of care to revel in my imperfect, yet beautiful, existence.
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Summary:
Entering my 40s has brought an unexpected surge of confidence. I embrace my body, choosing comfort over societal expectations, and have learned to prioritize authenticity in my life. Rather than fearing age, I celebrate it, understanding that true happiness lies in self-acceptance and genuine relationships.