We were originally planning for a family of five. Can you believe it? The reality began to sink in when I hit 20 weeks with our fifth child. My husband and I were still reeling from the news, especially since we already had four little ones at home, three of whom were under a year old. All I could think about was how to explain to everyone that we had four babies in just 13 months—plus our 12-year-old son.
It took us four—yes, FOUR—IVF cycles to finally conceive. We even relied on a surrogate to make sure we’d have a baby after she successfully carried twins and my pregnancy went to full term! When we finally made it through the first trimester on our fourth IVF attempt, we were thrilled but still very anxious about the possibility of complications. After a previous miscarriage, I was all too aware that time was not on my side.
After much contemplation, we concluded that surrogacy was our best option for expanding our family within a year. We transferred two embryos to our surrogate and were blessed with beautiful twin girls, alongside the baby girl I carried myself. This incredible journey had its ups and downs, but ultimately, it was worth it.
Anyone who knows me understands how difficult it was for me to let go of control. Trusting a stranger—albeit a thoroughly vetted one—was nerve-wracking. I felt deeply grateful to her for this life-changing gift, yet I couldn’t help but want to ensure she was eating nutritious meals, staying active, and driving safely. I found my peace over time, embracing the trust we placed in her. I communicated with all the doctors, ensured she had organic groceries, and even arranged massages for her comfort. I focused on the aspects I could influence and prayed for a successful outcome.
And thankfully, it all worked out! My surrogate was amazing, and I will forever be grateful for her role in bringing my daughters into the world. In just 13 months, our family expanded from three to seven. I gave birth to our daughter, Lily, and our son, Max, within a year of each other, while our surrogate delivered our twins, Ava and Mia, in between. Now, we have five children!
Surprisingly, managing four kids—one tween and three infants—has been quite manageable so far. We fell into a routine that worked for us, but adding another baby has certainly raised the stakes. Through this experience, I’ve learned that we must always be proactive, anticipating the needs of our children. If we don’t, chaos ensues!
Planning has become crucial. Each Sunday night, I sit down with my 12-year-old to review his schedule, aligning all activities and homework. My husband and I split tasks—groceries, meal prep, and work commitments—nearly everything. Our babies are on a strict feeding and sleep regimen.
It’s a balancing act, but we’re handling it. Of course, there are days when exhaustion leads us to tears, but ultimately, it’s all about love. The love we have for our family makes it all worthwhile. To everyone managing multiples or large families, I salute you—the struggle is real.
We are a community of unique women united by the challenges of motherhood. We are more than just mothers; we are partners, daughters, sisters, and friends, craving the opportunity to discuss topics beyond parenting. For those whose kids have outgrown diapers and daycare, check out our other resources for navigating the tween and teen years; they can be a tough ride!
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In summary, our journey to parenthood has been filled with unexpected twists but has ultimately highlighted the power of love and resilience in family life.