When my father passed away when I was just 12, the details of that time feel both sharp and foggy. I can vividly remember my mother’s slippers yet struggle to recall my father’s final words. However, one thing remains crystal clear: the food. The brunch following his memorial was abundant, with an array of cheeses, various pasta dishes, a multitude of salads, and warm, gooey chocolate chip cookies that practically melted in your mouth. In the days that followed, our fridge overflowed with casseroles and slow-cooked meals, all generously provided by friends and family. The timing, coinciding with the holiday season, meant we were also gifted all the ingredients for a festive feast: yams, hams, corn, and mashed potatoes. These meals not only nourished our bodies but also offered comfort during a painful time.
Fast forward to the winter of 2017, and I found myself in a deep depressive episode. I was struggling to work, eat, parent, or even sleep. Unlike the outpouring of support I experienced after my father’s death, my phone remained silent. No one reached out to check on me, no surprise visits arrived, and my pantry was bare. There were no comforting meals offered after I survived a suicide attempt.
I understand the hesitation. Mental illness is often perceived as frightening and misunderstood. People instinctively fear what they do not comprehend. While advancements in science have shed light on the complexities of mental health—recognizing that various factors like genetics, chemical imbalances, and environmental stressors contribute—misconceptions persist. Too many still view mental illness as a personal weakness or something that can be overcome through mere positive thinking. This stigma leads to feelings of shame, and many of us suffer in silence, keeping our struggles hidden.
However, those dealing with mental health issues require as much support and understanding as those facing physical ailments. Conditions such as anxiety and panic disorders can immobilize individuals, while depression may manifest in physical pain, leaving one utterly exhausted. The burden of mental illness can make even simple tasks feel insurmountable.
It’s crucial to engage with those who are struggling. Approach them calmly and create an atmosphere of familiarity. Listen without judgment or shame, and don’t let silence deter you from reaching out. When someone battles cancer, friends and family don’t wait for an invitation to help; they act immediately, offering rides to appointments, school runs for children, and even sending gift cards for self-care services. They also bring food, recognizing that small gestures can make a significant impact.
Unfortunately, those with mental health challenges often face silence instead of support. Organizations like Here to Help recommend striving for a balanced lifestyle and reaching out regularly. While I might wish to ask for help, the isolating nature of mental illness can convince me that I’m not worthy of assistance or affection. That fear of rejection can lead to further withdrawal.
If you suspect someone is having a tough time—whether they’re grappling with mental health issues or you’re concerned for their well-being—consider inviting them out or simply dropping by with a bag of bagels and coffee. Even if they don’t engage in conversation, they’ll appreciate the thought behind your gesture and feel a little less alone.
For more resources on supporting loved ones or seeking help for yourself, check out this other blog post. You can also visit Make a Mom for expert information on related topics. Additionally, for comprehensive pregnancy and home insemination resources, Hopkins Medicine is an excellent reference.
Summary:
This article discusses the disparity in support offered for mental health issues compared to physical ailments, emphasizing the importance of community and understanding. It urges individuals to reach out to those struggling with mental health challenges, highlighting that these issues require as much attention and care as any physical condition.