Last Saturday, as we made our way to our favorite sub shop, everything felt perfect. My kids had been exceptionally well-behaved. My daughter had even folded the laundry without any prompting, while my son, in a cheerful mood, saved me a few pieces of his chocolate caramel bar, knowing it was my favorite. The atmosphere in the car was warm and inviting, and I was almost tempted to surprise them with a puppy they had been longing for.
As we entered the shop, I nearly announced, “Let’s do it! Let’s go get a dog today!” But just as I turned to share my excitement, my 13-year-old son shouted, “WE COULD CALL HER PENIS!”
This wasn’t a slip of the tongue. He was fully aware of the long line of customers, all engrossed in their phones. Sensing the quietness, he felt the urge to break the silence, and he chose a rather crude way to do it. Despite my countless reminders about appropriate public behavior, he decided to be a little brat, clearly seeking the attention of the strangers around us.
Once again, I fell into the trap of believing my kids would behave just as well in public as they did at home. Isn’t it funny how children can manage to keep it together at home for hours, only to lose all semblance of civility the moment we step outside? It’s a special kind of anxiety that parents face when navigating public spaces filled with judgmental onlookers. And oh, do they know how to push our buttons.
From the time they were toddlers, my kids have perfected the art of being unruly in public. I’d be in a blissful moment at home, thinking a trip for ice cream was in order, only to be met with unexpected behavior. Kids seem uninterested in demonstrating the good manners we’ve instilled in them. Instead, they act as if they thrive on the shock value of their antics.
They’ll eat anything at home, yet at a friend’s dinner table, they’ll make faces and declare the meal “gross.” In a store, they might unleash a tantrum, throwing themselves on the floor unless they get that toy they “need.” And, of course, there’s my son shouting “PENIS!” for all to hear.
After becoming a parent, I quickly realized how many judgments I had made about other parents while out and about. I often thought, “If only they were better parents, their kids wouldn’t act like that.” Now, here I am, humbled, realizing that even the most diligent parent can have children who misbehave in public.
Maybe they’re just having a bad day or feeling unwell, but they don’t know how to express it. Perhaps they dislike their reflection in the harsh store lighting.
I wish I could tell you that this behavior improves with age—but I can’t lie. I have three teenagers who frequently remind me that I’m the strictest mom in the world, and yet we still navigate these challenges every time we step outside our home.
After my son’s outburst at the sub shop, I got exactly what I expected: judgmental glances. I could see the thoughts on people’s faces, thinking I was a terrible parent for not teaching my son better manners. Who shouts “WE COULD CALL HER PENIS!” in a crowded restaurant? A typical child, that’s who.
So, fellow parents, be warned and stay humble. You never know when your child will unleash their inner brat, reminding you that today is definitely not the day to reward them with a puppy.
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Summary
This article humorously reflects on the unpredictability of children’s behavior in public settings. Despite being well-mannered at home, kids can act out when surrounded by strangers, often leaving parents feeling judged. The author shares personal anecdotes illustrating this phenomenon, and reminds fellow parents to remain humble, as every child has their moments of mischief.