As I chat with a friend via text, they ask, “What are your plans for Christmas?” I respond, “I’m doing the same as Thanksgiving—staying home with my family.” Being part of the vulnerable population during this global pandemic has completely altered my world, including how I celebrate the holidays.
While many are busy making festive plans, traveling, or hosting gatherings, I find myself continuing in what feels like an extended lockdown. It’s a term that might not fully capture my experience, but after working from home and assisting my kids with their education since March, it feels fitting. Despite my enthusiastic love for Christmas, my family and I have decided to stay in.
We have crafted COVID-safe plans to ensure some holiday joy, and I refuse to let this virus steal all the magic of the season. Nonetheless, I can’t help but feel a sense of sadness knowing that for the first time in thirty-eight years, I won’t be celebrating Christmas with my parents and siblings. I will miss cuddling my three adorable nephews, decorating sugar cookies with my siblings, and watching my parents unwrap gifts.
The harsh truth is that the pandemic continues to be a reality, with December 25th being no exception. My medical specialists have advised me to exercise extreme caution. Their warnings have only increased following Thanksgiving, when many families gathered to share both meals and germs. Meanwhile, we opted for a “fancy” dinner at home, served on our wedding china. The risk of illness simply isn’t worth it for me.
My medical history is lengthy and complex, beginning with a stomach virus I contracted during my last college Thanksgiving. I struggled with alarming symptoms for a year and a half, including weight loss, fatigue, and constant thirst. One day, I collapsed from exhaustion, prompting my husband to rush me to the emergency room, where I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.
My medical team expressed how fortunate I was to be alive, given the critical state of my health. In the days that followed, I learned how to manage my diabetes, from calculating carbohydrates to administering insulin. However, I wish diabetes was my only health challenge; I am also a breast cancer survivor and have been diagnosed with lupus, another autoimmune condition. Although I may appear healthy at first glance, my body tirelessly battles these chronic illnesses every day.
The diabetic and lupus communities have faced considerable fear during the COVID-19 pandemic. Concerns about insulin shortages and medication accessibility have dominated our thoughts. Even without contracting the virus, the constant anxiety surrounding it looms large. Will hospitals have the capacity to care for my complex medical needs if I get sick?
I often hear people dismiss COVID-19 as “just a virus,” but for me, it was the trigger for my type 1 diabetes. Some may experience mild symptoms, while others face severe, life-threatening cases. The uncertainty is daunting.
It’s challenging to scroll through social media and see joyful family gatherings while grappling with feelings of isolation and being overlooked. I remind myself of the blessings I have—a safe home, a supportive partner, and my children. However, the ongoing pandemic leaves me uncertain about when things will return to normal.
Despite all this, I am committed to creating a festive atmosphere this Christmas. I’m planning menus, playing our favorite holiday songs, wrapping gifts, and baking cookies with my kids. I even ordered cozy pajamas to ensure I feel comfortable on the big day. Yet, the underlying truth remains: I am vulnerable, and any exposure to the virus could have serious consequences for my health.
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Summary:
The pandemic has drastically changed how vulnerable individuals celebrate the holidays, forcing them to prioritize health over tradition. Despite the challenges, there are ways to create a joyful atmosphere at home, emphasizing the importance of safety and self-care.