I’ve been exploring my own pleasure for quite some time now. The twist is that it wasn’t until I hit my forties that I truly embraced masturbation as a vital aspect of self-care.
I vividly recall a college party during my senior year, sitting with a few friends. After polishing off a box of wine, the topic of masturbation arose. I raised my hand without hesitation, admitting that I occasionally indulged, but I had never used my hands—always opting for a tool. In the early ’90s, when vibrators were scarce, we often had to get creative. Yet, when everyone else in the room claimed they had never engaged in such activities, I returned to sipping my affordable White Zinfandel, feeling a little out of place.
For much of my life, I grappled with guilt surrounding masturbation. As a teenager and young adult, it felt shameful and selfish. Afterward, I would often lower my head in embarrassment, considering it a last resort. Instead of exploring my sexual feelings, I would either suppress them or rush through the experience, seeking mere relief.
It’s clear that discussions around the benefits of masturbation for those with vaginas have been limited, overshadowed by a focus on male experiences. Thankfully, this narrative is changing as we recognize the incredible benefits of self-exploration.
If you find the idea of masturbation uncomfortable, know that you’re not alone. My journey progressed from simply rubbing against objects while dressed to fully embracing nudity and exploring every part of myself. If you haven’t yet ventured into this realm, I highly recommend it. My confidence in intimate settings skyrocketed when I began prioritizing my own pleasure.
It’s essential to remember: denying your own body is one of the harshest forms of rejection. There are no right or wrong ways to experience pleasure, and let’s be honest, you are likely to know your body better than anyone else. So why not indulge yourself fully?
There’s no reason to settle for mediocre experiences. I often think back to those years living alone, surrounded by candles and beautiful lingerie, and wonder why I didn’t fully embrace my sensuality then.
Ultimately, incorporating masturbation into your self-care routine is empowering. How can we expect anyone else to satisfy us if we don’t first understand what brings us joy? Self-exploration can lead to intense orgasms—who wouldn’t want that?
Whether you’re in a relationship or single, feeling aroused doesn’t mean you have to wait for your partner. In fact, the more I explore myself, the more in touch I feel with my sexuality when I do finally connect with my partner. It’s like keeping a gentle flame alive.
Additionally, there are numerous health benefits associated with orgasms. They can enhance your skin and even slow down the aging process. A study from the University of Michigan revealed that orgasms increase estrogen levels, which can improve your mood and keep your skin looking youthful.
Orgasms also serve as excellent stress relievers and can elevate your happiness levels, thanks to oxytocin, the “feel-good” hormone. Plus, they can help with sleep and alleviate headaches or menstrual cramping. Just as we nourish our bodies with food and exercise, we should also acknowledge the importance of masturbation as a crucial element of self-care.
If you’re unsure where to start on your journey of self-exploration, set aside some time for yourself—even if it’s just in the shower. Take a moment to relax and gently explore your body. Remind yourself of the nourishing effects this can have on your well-being.
Trust me, it won’t be long before you find yourself craving those intimate moments with yourself, and your confidence will soar.
For too long, women and those with vaginas have been conditioned to prioritize their partners’ pleasure. It’s time to shift that focus inward and recognize that the love and care we extend to others should also be directed toward ourselves.
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Summary:
Masturbation is often overlooked as a significant form of self-care for women and those with vaginas. Embracing self-exploration can lead to heightened confidence, better understanding of one’s body, and numerous health benefits. It’s time to prioritize our own pleasure and recognize that self-love is essential to overall well-being.