My children have been requesting a “Yes Day” for a couple of years now. This is a day where you say yes to everything they ask for—within reason—over a 24-hour period. I kept delaying it by asking what their ideal day would look like. Their answer? Unlimited screen time.
First off, these kids are not exactly deprived of electronics; we’ve had countless days filled with video games and movies. So, that part could easily happen. However, a true “Yes Day” requires more thought, which is partly why I’ve hesitated. If we are to dedicate a day to saying yes, they need to come up with creative ideas and plans. I also mentioned that we would need some rules, but that was as far as we got.
After watching the new Netflix film “Yes Day” starring Jennifer Garner, the notion has resurfaced, and now I’m determined to finally plan our “Yes Day.” The movie is based on Amy Krouse Rosenthal’s book of the same name. Before taking on the role, Garner used the book as inspiration to create a family tradition of “Yes Day.” In an interview, she shared, “I pitched it, produced it, found the writer. I wanted to do this and chose to work. I need joy as a person. And I need joy coming at me.”
While watching the film, my children and I found not just joy, but also reminders of the appreciation we often overlook in our daily lives, especially during a pandemic. The film contrasts life without kids and with them, showing how much easier it is to say yes to fun activities when you only have yourself to consider. With kids, “fun” often involves risky decisions made by still-developing brains. And, of course, these requests usually come at the most inconvenient times—right before bed, during homework, or when focus is required.
It’s not that parents don’t want their kids to have fun; it’s that we want to keep them safe, and saying no can become a reflex. While watching, I noticed how often parents say no, and I could see the disappointment on my kids’ faces. I hate seeing that look; it reminds me of the stress and busyness that often overwhelm me. I want to be more playful with them, especially as my oldest is now 10 and the twins are nearly eight. “Yes Day” was a poignant reminder to embrace their still-young years.
The movie also sheds light on family dynamics, highlighting the typical roles parents play: one being the fun-loving parent, while the other is often the planner and rule-enforcer. My kids observed this dynamic in the film and initially thought I should be more like the “fun dad.” Thankfully, my ex and I share the responsibilities, and we parent in complementary ways rather than one shouldering everything.
By showing the kids what goes into my decision-making process, they began to understand the challenges I face. They recognized their own roles in our family chaos and how it can affect my responses. I told them I want to say “yes” more often and plan for a “Yes Day” once it feels safe to do so post-pandemic. We all agreed that the constant no’s have been a drag, but we can wait a bit longer for a well-planned day of yes.
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Summary
Watching “Yes Day” with my children was a heartwarming reminder of the joy we can find in embracing moments together. It prompted a conversation about spontaneity and fun, and the importance of planning a day where we can say “yes” more often.