If you’ve ever dined at a seafood restaurant, you might have had the experience of selecting your own lobster from a tank. It seems like a fun idea, right? But here’s the catch — not every lobster is the same! You usually pay by the pound, so if you chose a hefty one, prepare for a hefty bill. Opted for a smaller one? You might be left feeling hungry not long after. On the bright side, your wallet remains a bit heavier (and if you’re at a place like Red Lobster, you can always indulge in some cheddar biscuits). If you’ve ever faced a lobster dinner mishap, it probably wasn’t amusing at the time. But we’re here to transform that experience into something enjoyable with a collection of lobster puns and jokes!
Lobster puns and jokes are perfect for those who appreciate these fascinating crustaceans. Let’s give a shoutout to the lobster tanks at your local grocery store for making lobsters seem less intimidating! Although, if you encounter one on the beach, it can be quite the shock — those claws and the fact that they “urinate” from their faces can be a bit much. Yes, you read that right! It sounds like a punchline in itself.
So, without further ado, here are some hilarious lobster puns and jokes to share at your next lobster feast.
Lobster Puns
- Lobsters prefer their morning clawfee piping hot.
- When lobsters answer the phone, they say, “Shello?”
- Lobsters love to celebrate holidays because it’s ’tis the sea-son!
- A lobster shed tears when his teacher called him a lost claws.
- The subject the failing lobster was struggling with? Algae-bra.
- A lobster left home because of pier pressure.
- Lady lobsters wear seashells since they’ve outgrown their B-shells.
- A lobster asked its catfish friend, “Who’s your cod-father?”
- Someone searched Portland for lobster but came up empty. Talk about a Maine attraction!
- The lobster lost its fortune after shelling out too much cash.
- Lobsters make awful friends as they tend to be shellfish.
- A lobster reported a crime, but the police asked it to be more Pacific.
- When one lobster thought about proposing, his buddy asked if he was shore.
- At a lobster wedding, the groom affectionately referred to his bride as his “butter half.”
- The lobster declared it was diving into boiling water, and everyone thought he was cray-sea.
- At a farewell party, one lobster told another that he was one shell of a guy.
- The lobster found retirement difficult because he was tide to his job.
- Because she was late every day, she lost her job.
- After getting into a spat, a lobster apologized, saying he was just salty.
- The crustacean playing tennis was a true lob-star.
- A lobster’s signature move? The lob.
- If you mix a lobster and a phone, you’ll get snappy talk.
- Anticipating an important call, the lobster crabbed the phone.
- The ocean didn’t say a word to the lobster; it simply waved.
- The lobster turned red because it saw the sea weed.
Lobster Jokes
- I dined at Mary Poppins’ restaurant last night… Super cauliflower cheese, but the lobster was terrible.
- Why are lobsters terrible at sharing? They’re shellfish.
- What do you call a lobster that’s claustrophobic? Claws-trophobic.
- What do you call a stressed-out lobster? A frustracean.
- I went to a seafood restaurant and inquired about how they prepared the lobster. The waiter paused and said, “We just tell him the truth, man. ‘This is the end of the line.’”
- A man saw a sign for “Lobster Tails, $5” and thought it was a steal. He handed over a $5 bill and waited for his tail. The vendor replied, “Once upon a time, there was a lobster…”
- Did you hear about the brawl at Red Lobster? Four fish were battered!
- Who brings gifts to well-behaved lobsters during Christmas? Santa Claws.
- How much salt do lobsters use when cooking pasta? Just a pinch.
- Where do lobsters work at the bakery? At the crust station.
- One lobster took another on a date. The male lobster offered to pay, making the female lobster blush. “It’s be-claws I love you,” he said.
- How do lobsters get around the beach? By shell-i-copter.
- What’s a famous lobster called? A shellebrity.
- Where do crabs and lobsters park their public transport? At the bustacean.
- Why did the lobster visit the physiotherapist? He pulled a mussel.
- A man ordered lobster for dinner. When served a one-clawed lobster, he complained. The waiter replied, “That lobster was in a fight.” The man said, “Bring me the winner!”
- Why couldn’t the woman eat shrimp, lobsters, and clams cooked by vapor? She has shellfish steam issues.
- What do you call a crab that throws things? A lobster.
- Where does a lobster store its clothes? In the clawset.
- Why was the ocean yelling? You’d be too with lobsters on your bottom!
- Did you hear about the lobster that rode a sea mammal into battle? He did it on porpoise.
- Where are there no hipster lobsters? In the Maine stream.
- Where do lobsters go to borrow money? To the prawn brokers.
- What’s the perfect name for a pet lobster? Clawde.
- Did you hear about the fight between blue and red lobsters? Other lobsters said it was like a sea-n from a movie.
- What’s worse than lobsters on your piano? Crabs on your organ.
- Where do lobsters catch the bus? At the bustacean.
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Summary
Lobster puns and jokes are a delightful way to bring laughter to your seafood dining experience. From silly wordplay about their claws to clever jokes about their lives, these humorous quips can lighten any mood. Whether at a formal lobster feast or a casual dinner, sharing these puns and jokes will surely earn you a round of applause!