My Mother is an Anti-Vaxxer, and It’s Complicated

pregnant gay couple cartoonartificial insemination kit for humans

My mother is unique—a free spirit who insists on trying ‘shrooms before her time is up. She’ll turn 94 next August. She’s many things: a passionate reader, a terrible cook, a delightful provocateur, a woman who questions, “Where are all the women?!” while watching Congress. She’s witty, stubborn, and incredibly kind, always opening her home to her grandchildren’s friends in need. To us, she’s our guiding star, the benchmark for our family values.

Yet, she is also an anti-vaxxer.

This dichotomy baffles me. I consider myself quite progressive, but standing next to her, my views might seem more conservative. She passionately champions universal healthcare and student debt relief, firmly believes that the government should stay out of women’s reproductive rights, and advocates for social equality, supporting movements like BLM and LGBTQIA+ rights. I remember when Kathy Griffin staged her infamous photo; I heard her mutter, “Well, someone has to take a stand.” And this is a woman in her 90s.

But when it comes to vaccines, our paths diverge sharply.

Before the vaccine rollout, she entertained my admiration for Dr. Fauci, even joking about his charm. We shared laughs watching him debate, and she even gifted me a Fauci tote bag. Then the vaccines came, and suddenly, Fauci was a pariah in her eyes. Although she’s never been pro-vaccine—just as she’s skeptical of microwaves and fluoride—her strong distrust of medical professionals has deep roots. Her views on government-backed vaccinations echo her long-held skepticism toward authority.

How can she dismiss the efficacy of Clorox and hydroxychloroquine yet embrace Ivermectin? I didn’t grasp her stance until a recent visit when I flippantly remarked, “How foolish do you have to be to use horse de-wormer?” She retorted, “How foolish is it to get a Covid vaccine?” When I confessed I’d been vaccinated, she insisted I wear a mask to avoid putting her at risk.

Then came the barrage of emails filled with conspiracy theories. Titles suggested vaccines could make you magnetic or were filled with microchips. It was claimed that vaccines create “toxins” that affect the brain and that autism is a potential side effect of vaccination. I told her I would endure any side effects rather than succumb to a painful Covid death. Her response? “Well, I guess that’s your choice.”

When I presented her with hard facts, she brushed them off, saying, “They’re just trying to divide us.” I didn’t even inquire who “they” might be; her reaction mirrored the “fake news” rhetoric we’ve both criticized since 2016.

Now, my mother resembles a caricature of conspiracy theorists, more akin to Marjorie Taylor Greene than the outspoken advocate she once was. This shift creates a significant dilemma for me.

I liken anti-vaxxers to those who refuse evacuation orders during natural disasters—not the ones who can’t evacuate, but those who stubbornly cling to their ground. I don’t see them as courageous; instead, they seem selfish. Their refusal can sometimes lead to unnecessary risks for first responders. What about those who tried to follow the guidance but couldn’t? Are they left behind?

When I hear stories of regretful anti-vaxxers, I do feel sympathy, but my initial reaction is often critical: “You’re taking a hospital bed from someone who needs it. You’re burdening healthcare workers—and now you feel regret?”

But how do I reconcile those feelings with the fact that my own mother, a respected family figure, is spreading anti-vaccine sentiments and has swayed at least nine other relatives to share her views? I fear for her health, especially since she describes her home as a “mask-free zone.” I’m ashamed to think of her that way, yet she is complicit in this.

I want to echo her words: “Well, I guess that’s your choice.” But in a time when our nation has suffered significant losses, it’s not just about the individual anymore. It’s about collective action to combat this pandemic.

Unfortunately, I don’t see her mindset changing. I never viewed my mother in this light before, but I now wish she would reconsider her stance.

This article reflects on the complexities of family dynamics amid a public health crisis, and the challenges of understanding loved ones with differing beliefs. If you’re interested in further exploring topics related to home insemination and pregnancy, check out this excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination.

For more insights into family planning, you can visit these links: home insemination kit, intracervical insemination, and IVF and fertility preservation.

Search Queries:

In summary, navigating the complexities of differing beliefs within family dynamics can be challenging, especially during a public health crisis. Understanding and compassion are key, but so is advocating for collective responsibility in health matters.