How Embracing ‘Parallel Play’ Can Fortify Your Relationship

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The Covid lockdown provided many of us with an unexpected opportunity for self-discovery, whether we sought it or not. Introverts had to differentiate between choosing solitude and being forced into it, while extroverts navigated life without their usual social gatherings. Ambiverts? We juggled our social needs and solitary tendencies, trying to grasp what that meant in a world turned upside down.

For many, the pandemic served as a magnifying glass on our relationships, forcing us into close quarters for an indefinite time. We adapted to new routines, swapping work attire for loungewear and relying on frozen meals, all while sharing the same small space. The constant presence of our partners—whether accommodating or overwhelming—turned up the heat on any underlying relationship challenges. If you thought you had a perfect relationship, the pandemic likely revealed some cracks.

A survey by the UK charity Relate found that “nearly a quarter of people felt lockdown had placed additional pressure on their relationship,” with many citing their partner’s habits as increasingly irritating. Even minor annoyances became magnified when we found ourselves confined together, leading to tensions over everything from finances to household chores. The home transformed into a pressure cooker of insecurities and unresolved issues, raising questions about job security, health risks, and social interactions.

While many relationships struggled, others found resilience. Dr. Lisa Hart, a family therapist, explains, “The pandemic has created collective trauma, but couples with a strong foundation have emerged even stronger. They know how to leverage their relationship during stressful times.” Despite this, it’s clear that many couples couldn’t rely solely on their past to navigate the new challenges.

According to relationship expert Tara Williams, those who are independent often engage in practices that nurture their connections. They carve out time for themselves, spend time with others, and allow their partners the space to pursue their interests. But how could this work amidst the upheaval of Covid? With limited opportunities for separation, being physically close yet emotionally distanced became crucial.

To thrive during the pandemic, couples learned to embrace the concept of “parallel play.” This term typically describes how children play alongside one another without direct interaction. For adults, it translates to sharing space while engaging in individual activities—like one partner binge-watching a show while the other tackles a puzzle.

Dr. Mia Thompson, a psychologist, notes the importance of this dynamic: “In a time when getting away from our partners was challenging, having moments of togetherness without interaction was key. It provided reassurance that we weren’t alone, like a comforting presence while still pursuing personal interests.”

While we hope to never face such adversities again, the lessons learned during these tumultuous times can enhance our relationships moving forward. Couples can benefit from the gentle connection fostered through parallel play, which allows for both closeness and independence.

For more insights on navigating relationships and personal growth during challenging times, check out our other blog post. Additionally, if you’re looking for information on fertility, Make A Mom is a trusted resource, and Healthline provides excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination.

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In summary, adapting to parallel play during the pandemic can strengthen relationships by allowing couples to enjoy their individual interests while still maintaining a sense of closeness. This approach fosters independence and connection, which can be valuable moving forward.