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Each morning, after I drop off my kids at school, I watch them walk inside, silently wishing for their safety before heading out for a run. As a ritual, I treat myself to a Coke Zero from my go-to fast food spot where the staff knows me by name. They often ask about my writing and occasionally hand me my drink without asking for payment.
However, today was different. They noticed my swollen, bloodshot eyes and tear-streaked face. “What’s wrong?!” the cashier inquired, clearly concerned. “Adele just released a new song about divorce, and I don’t think I’ll ever get over it,” I admitted, and she cautiously handed me my drink, stepping back as if to give me space.
If you see anyone wandering around this weekend with smeared makeup or wearing sunglasses indoors, it’s likely they’ve got ‘Easy On Me’ on repeat—just like me. No matter how many times I promise myself that this will be the last listen because I’m out of tears, I can’t resist.
I’ve always cherished Adele’s music, but even those who aren’t die-hard fans agree that her songs resonate deeply with listeners. She holds nothing back and has a unique talent for conveying heartbreak.
As a divorced woman, many of her songs evoke memories of my marriage, family, and the end of my relationship. No matter who you are, experiencing a marriage’s dissolution leaves lasting feelings that can be stirred by a song. Adele’s ‘Easy On Me’ struck a chord deeper than any other song ever has. It felt like a heartfelt conversation directed at her son about her divorce, articulated in a way I had never encountered before, yet I felt every word.
I understand that everyone interprets music in their own unique way. What resonates with me may reflect my own story, and often, we find what we’re searching for in a song. When I first heard ‘Easy On Me,’ it felt like my heart was opened, presenting the sentiments I’ve wished to express to my children since their father and I parted ways.
I had the best intentions
And the highest of hopes
But I know right now
It probably doesn’t even show
There are moments I’ve wanted to express these feelings to them, especially during times of tension, when I didn’t manage things well, or on days when my emotions surrounding the divorce overshadowed my ability to be a good mom. But I held back, thinking it was unfair to burden them with my feelings. That’s guilt talking.
It’s perfectly acceptable to tell your kids—or anyone else—that you’re navigating tough times and need them to be understanding. It’s okay to acknowledge that you’ve caused hurt and still seek their compassion. It’s also okay to have a marriage that didn’t work out, feel guilty about it, and struggle to keep it together for your kids.
As a divorced mom, it’s not your responsibility to endure the emotional rollercoaster of divorce while maintaining a facade of toughness. I eagerly await the release of Adele’s full album in November; I suspect there will be a tissue shortage soon.
While this song emphasizes the need for compassion from others, remember to extend that same grace to yourself during tough times, including divorce. If you need a reminder, just listen to ‘Easy On Me’ by Adele once—or twenty-five times, like I did.
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In summary, Adele’s ‘Easy On Me’ resonates with many divorced mothers, capturing the emotional complexities surrounding divorce and motherhood. It serves as a reminder to seek understanding from others while also practicing self-compassion.