artificial insemination kit for humans
In a heartfelt piece for Time Magazine, Jessica Taylor shares her challenging journey toward surrogacy. She discusses her diagnosis of adenomyosis and the heart-wrenching experiences of multiple miscarriages. When her reproductive endocrinologist suggested surrogacy as the most viable path to a healthy baby, she conveyed the deep emotional turmoil that ensued. Jessica’s story resonates with many intended mothers who connect with my surrogacy blog.
My own journey to surrogacy was fraught with difficulties. In 2019, I was expecting my first son, Max. During a routine 24-week ultrasound, doctors discovered that Max was alarmingly underweight and that the placenta was failing. He was delivered via c-section at just 25 weeks but tragically passed away after two weeks in the NICU. The medical team warned us that the likelihood of facing a similar situation in future pregnancies was high. They advised me to take baby aspirin as soon as I conceived and simply “hope for the best” to reach 32 weeks. Unsettled by this uncertainty, my husband and I opted for surrogacy.
Unlike some mothers-to-be, I embraced the idea of surrogacy wholeheartedly from the start. Pregnancy had never excited me, even before my experience with Max. Initially, I was anxious about gaining weight and managing my changing body. However, once I became pregnant, my focus shifted entirely to my health. I suffered from hyperemesis gravidarum, a severe form of nausea and vomiting, leaving me feeling like I had the flu for most of the time. Although surrogacy comes at a steep price (~$75,000), it felt worth it to ensure a healthy baby and well-being for me.
My challenging pregnancy experience fueled my passion for surrogacy. Many people underestimate the struggles that can accompany pregnancy; however, after going through a difficult one, I gained a newfound respect for those who have straightforward journeys. I also learned that pregnancy can be perilous – my blood pressure, which was normally 110/70, averaged around 140/80 for over a year after my pregnancy. It took my body a year and a half to completely recover. Pregnancy is undeniably tough.
The challenges that led me to surrogacy made me immensely grateful for our surrogate, Emily. It’s hard to articulate the emotions I experience knowing that a woman was willing to dedicate so much of herself to help us expand our family. After enduring so much pain and loss, it felt like a miracle that Emily, a complete stranger, chose to offer her body and time to help us heal. I truly cherish this extraordinary gift and fully recognize the risks she took to bring our baby into the world, which only deepens my admiration for her.
I connected with our second son, Leo, through my relationship with Emily. From the outset, I believed that our bond would positively influence him. One way we nurtured this connection was by cooking for her weekly. By investing time in preparing meals, we felt like we were creating “positive” energy that she could pass on to the baby. Although this idea may not have scientific backing, it was meaningful to us. We communicated regularly throughout the pregnancy, and I enjoyed learning about her daily life and ensuring her well-being. Our bond began long before the embryo transfer, making the process smoother and more rewarding. We even created a Spotify playlist and recorded my husband singing and me reading books (including in French!) for her to play with headphones on her belly, hoping our voices would comfort Leo after his birth.
Honestly, I feel a stronger connection with Leo than I did with Max. My health complications during Max’s pregnancy hindered my ability to bond. Society often paints pregnancy as a picturesque experience for mothers and babies to connect, but this isn’t always the reality. Despite what conventional wisdom suggests, I can say that having another woman carry my baby was one of the most beautiful experiences of my life.
If you’re interested in learning more about surrogacy and its many facets, consider checking out this insightful blog post, as well as this comprehensive guide which provides valuable information on the topic. For those looking for resources on fertility and home insemination, UCSF’s FAQ page is an excellent reference.
Summary
The journey to surrogacy can be filled with emotional and physical challenges, as illustrated by Jessica Taylor and my own experience. Embracing surrogacy offered us a path to family-building, allowing us to find joy and hope amid the pain of loss. Establishing a bond with our surrogate, Emily, was integral to our experience, leading to a deeper connection with our second son, Leo.
Search Queries: