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As the holiday season approaches, many of us find ourselves overwhelmed with emotions while scrolling through social media. In an enlightening discussion with Parenting Today, Dr. Lisa Martinez, a clinical psychologist and author of Tuned Out and Stressed Out: How Social Media Affects Your Mental Health and What You Can Do About It, offers valuable insights on navigating the emotional rollercoaster that social media can provoke during this festive time.
According to recent statistics from the Pew Research Center, a staggering 69% of adults and 86% of young adults in the U.S. are active on social media. While these platforms can provide glimpses into people’s lives, they often only showcase highlights, leaving out the more mundane or difficult realities. Dr. Martinez points out, “Upward comparisons arise when we measure ourselves against others whom we perceive as superior. For example, we might think that a virtual acquaintance is more successful or attractive than we are. Such comparisons can diminish our self-esteem, leading to feelings of envy, resentment, and shame.”
We’ve all experienced it—looking at a friend’s post and thinking, “Why can’t my child smile like that?” or “I wish I could afford the latest gadgets.” These thoughts can spiral into a cycle of negativity. However, Dr. Martinez suggests that these uncomfortable feelings can serve as opportunities for personal growth and emotional development.
As the new year approaches, if you’re planning to make some positive changes in 2022, consider improving your relationship with social media. Dr. Martinez recommends understanding your attachment style and how it influences your connection with technology and social media. According to attachment theory, the dynamics of our early relationships can significantly impact our future connections. Certain attachment styles may make individuals more vulnerable to the adverse effects of social media.
It’s crucial to recognize social media as just another relationship in your life—one that may require boundaries. This concept is also applicable for teaching children how to engage with social media healthily, especially during the holiday season when peer comparisons can be even more pronounced.
Dr. Martinez shares four practical tips to support your children—and yourself—during this time:
- Help Kids Develop a Realistic View of Social Media: It’s essential to remind them that social media often presents an idealized version of life. Behind every perfect photo, there may be challenges that remain unseen.
- Encourage Mindfulness About Social Media Use: Regularly check in with your child about their social media experiences, discussing their feelings and any negative encounters they might have.
- Teach Emotional Awareness: Use holidays as a moment to talk openly about how social media might affect mood. If you know that a quick scroll through Instagram leaves your child feeling down, suggest taking a break instead.
- Promote Real-Life Connections: Encourage your kids to prioritize face-to-face interactions. Dr. Martinez emphasizes the importance of in-person relationships, suggesting that when physical meetings aren’t possible, maintaining contact through calls or texts is vital.
As our relationships with social media evolve, a holiday detox might be just what you need to safeguard your mental health. Take this time to focus on being present with your family, fostering genuine connections, and appreciating the reality around you. Remember that what you see online is often a curated highlight reel, not the full picture of someone’s life.
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For additional information on using social media mindfully and its impact on mental health, please visit this privacy policy for guidance.
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Summary: The holidays can intensify emotions as we navigate social media, often leading to negative feelings through comparisons. Dr. Lisa Martinez offers strategies for fostering a healthier relationship with social media, emphasizing the importance of realistic perspectives, mindfulness, emotional awareness, and in-person connections. By creating boundaries and focusing on genuine interactions, we can protect our mental health and enjoy the holiday season.