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The sounds of my son and his friends fill the upstairs hallway, their voices rising in excitement as they play. “Move left!” “Get him! Watch your back!” Suddenly, a triumphant shout cuts through the air. He’s done it! After weeks of pleading with me, he has finally clinched his first elusive Battle Royale victory alongside his pals—each one cheering from their own homes, connected through the magic of technology.
After months of research, positive reports from his teachers, and a compelling pitch from him, I finally relented and allowed him to dive into the world of Fortnite, a game that has become a cultural phenomenon among boys his age. It’s a fantasy, non-violent last-man-standing game that can be played solo or in teams. A couple of months and one birthday later, he’s now fully equipped with an Xbox setup featuring a gaming chair and monitor. My tendency to go all-in when it comes to my kids’ interests is evident, and while I’m not necessarily proud of it, here I am, navigating my mixed feelings about the whole experience.
On the positive side, I appreciate that Fortnite serves as a social outlet for him and his friends, especially during sick days, rainy afternoons, and the long winter months. I know the kids he plays with and their families, which gives me peace of mind about his online interactions. Still, I had to establish some ground rules. We set up a gaming schedule based on earned privileges, and crucially, I enforced a strict no-communication policy with strangers. I quickly learned this lesson after overhearing some random teammates using inappropriate language. Now, he can only communicate in small, controlled games with friends he knows, while the game is muted otherwise. It’s a bit chaotic, but I prefer this arrangement to the alternative.
There are additional benefits, too. I love seeing his joy as he earns new titles and explores virtual worlds. He laughs, celebrates, and sometimes even turns to me, eager to share insights about his digital universe. This gaming experience has become a great motivational tool, rewarding good behavior and providing a tangible consequence when needed—something I’ve struggled to find at this age.
However, there are aspects that leave me feeling uneasy. The numerous in-game purchase options create a clear divide between players who spend money and those who don’t. Each character has a basic outfit or “skin,” but players can accumulate hundreds over time. While some skins can be earned by playing, many are available for purchase with “V-bucks,” resulting in a strange hierarchy among friends. This constant push for more V-bucks can be quite annoying, and the whole situation feels somewhat distasteful.
I also worry about the game’s content. While my son argues that there’s no blood or gore, players still eliminate others using a variety of weapons. Research has shown that gaming doesn’t necessarily lead to violent behavior, and I grew up in a household that allowed gaming without negative outcomes. Yet, I can’t shake my concern about how too much screen time might affect my child’s development. I’m apprehensive about the natural defiance that arises regarding the rules we’ve established, and I’m particularly focused on fostering empathy and kindness in him as he grows.
Essentially, I’m still figuring this all out. I don’t have a perfect plan, but I’m committed to creating a balanced, safe, and enjoyable environment for him. I realize this is just the beginning of a long journey filled with parenting decisions that may leave me feeling a bit uncertain, especially as we approach the challenges of the Internet, smartphones, and social media. The pre-teen and teenage years will undoubtedly present their own set of dilemmas, and I’m determined to navigate these experiences together.
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