10 Essential Insights About Newborns

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When I was expecting my first child, a decade and countless sleepless nights ago, I approached pregnancy much like my academic pursuits: voraciously consuming information, taking notes, participating in classes, and engaging in online forums. I was always an eager learner—perhaps a bit of an overachiever—and I aimed to excel in Motherhood 101.

I meticulously attended childbirth classes, toured the hospital, and even dragged my partner to breastfeeding preparation sessions. I washed all the baby clothes in hypoallergenic, scent-free detergent and diligently practiced my kegels. Then, I had my baby.

And much like many new mothers, I found myself in an unforeseen reality: lying in bed, dealing with bodily fluids, stitches in unexpected places, and surging hormones. All I could think was, “Why didn’t anyone warn me?” The truth is, during pregnancy, I was only interested in discussing pregnancy, childbirth, strollers, and diaper disposal systems. I completely overlooked the fact that giving birth is just the beginning.

Here are ten things I wish I had been told—and truly listened to—before embarking on my parenting journey:

1. First Impressions May Differ: Upon first seeing or holding your newborn, you might not experience that euphoric moment often depicted in movies. You could still be undergoing medical procedures, in pain, and utterly exhausted. It’s perfectly normal if you don’t feel that overwhelming joy immediately; those moments will come in time.
2. Bathroom Visits Are a Challenge: Your first trip to the restroom post-delivery will be a significant event. Don’t hesitate to ask for assistance; the risk of fainting is real, and you will quickly realize that your privacy as a mother is fleeting. This is just the beginning of many humbling moments on your parenting journey.
3. Breastfeeding Can Be Tough: Getting the hang of breastfeeding takes time and patience. It may hurt initially, and many mothers experience discomfort during the early weeks. If breastfeeding becomes too difficult, remember that your baby’s nutrition and your bond are what truly matter, not the method of feeding.
4. Emotional Rollercoaster Ahead: By the fourth day postpartum, you may find yourself crying frequently. This is often when hormones take a nosedive. You may feel overwhelmed by your circumstances. Allow yourself to feel these emotions, but seek help if sadness persists.
5. Pajamas Over Real Clothes: For at least the first two weeks, consider staying in pajamas. Once you dress in “real” clothes, people may expect you to function as though you have it all together. Enjoy the comfort and ease of fresh pajamas as you navigate healing and caring for your newborn.
6. Sleep Patterns Vary: Newborns do not always sleep well, and this does not reflect your parenting abilities. Eventually, they will establish a sleep routine. Other parents may exaggerate their experiences; every baby is different when it comes to sleep.
7. Trust Your Instincts: Don’t let anyone undermine your confidence in knowing your baby. There is no one “right” way to parent. Listen to your instincts rather than adhering strictly to the methods of your own parents or in-laws.
8. Seek Support: Connecting with other new mothers can be invaluable. Whether through neighborhood groups, breastfeeding circles, or hospital programs, having a network of fellow new parents can help ease the transition and provide essential emotional support.
9. Avoid Martyrdom: Don’t feel like you need to do everything yourself. Recognize that it’s okay to ask for help—whether hiring someone or simply asking friends to hold the baby while you take a break. Acknowledging the challenges doesn’t diminish your love for your child.
10. Capture the Moments: Take plenty of photographs, and ensure you’re in them. These moments will pass quickly, and the memories may fade.

Above all, I wish someone had told me that the first year of motherhood is unparalleled. Each day may feel lengthy, yet it holds miraculous moments. You will change in ways you can’t predict, and you will often find yourself reflecting on experiences that no one else can prepare you for.

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Summary

Motherhood is a transformative journey filled with unexpected challenges and joys. Understanding what to expect during the early days can help new parents navigate this overwhelming yet rewarding experience. By seeking support, trusting instincts, and embracing the moment, parents can find their way through this unique chapter of life.