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The Unwelcome Return of Stirrup Pants: A Cautionary Commentary
Currently, I find myself unemployed, a situation that is not a reflection of my abilities but rather the result of unforeseen layoffs. With the children back in school and our new routine established, I suddenly find myself with significant free time on my hands three days a week. This is alright; I occupy myself by writing, decluttering the basement, and preparing an array of nutritious snacks. (For instance, I add raisins to my chocolate chip cookies because, after all, fruit is healthy. Plus, they taste fantastic! And since no one else in my family seems to touch them, I get to enjoy all the healthy snacks!)
Much of my day is spent on the couch, “resting, rejuvenating, and reviving” by indulging in television. I have an affinity for traditional viewing, where I channel surf and occasionally stumble upon delightful surprises. This method, however, means I also encounter a fair share of commercials. As someone who grew up with this experience, I’m accustomed to the periodic commercial breaks—which provide a perfect opportunity to grab a snack or switch the laundry.
One particular commercial recently captivated my attention. It was as if I had been transported back to 1985, reminiscent of “Peggy Sue Got Married.” The advertisement promoted the latest fall fashion trend: stirrup pants.
Stirrup pants first gained popularity during my junior high years, with every girl in my class owning at least one pair. The prevailing debate at the time was whether to wear socks over or under the stirrups. Most opted for the outside, creating a tucked-in appearance that obscured the stirrup itself but was undeniably stylish. Those who dared to wear their socks inside the stirrups were considered slightly less fashionable, but the mere presence of stirrup pants made it clear they were in vogue.
While it’s likely that modern stirrup pants have undergone some redesign, let’s be honest: their basic nature remains unchanged, much like a bra, which can be adorned but ultimately serves one function. The discomfort associated with stirrup pants is also worth noting. The woman in the commercial flaunts her stirrup pants with heels, exuding confidence, yet I know the reality. The elastic strap wraps around the arch of her foot, stretching slightly with each step until it pulls the pants down, necessitating frequent adjustments that are anything but graceful.
The human foot is replete with nerve endings, which is why we are particularly sensitive there. Consequently, the constant tugging of a stirrup strap becomes intolerable. I have no desire to relive those high school experiences; at this age, the only elastic I want on my pants is around the waist. As we grew tired of stirrup straps, we began wearing the pants with the stirrups hanging off our legs, an odd look that ultimately became the more comfortable and, ironically, the “cool” way to wear them.
After that initial year of stirrup pants, they quickly fell out of favor. If someone wore them the following year, they were deemed uncool, regardless of how they styled them. I predict this latest fashion revival will meet a similar fate—not just due to discomfort but because the term “stirrup” now evokes memories more suited to medical visits than fashion statements. Many of us who wore stirrup pants in our youth are unlikely to embrace a trend associated with unfashionable paper gowns and awkward instructions like “scoot to the end of the table.”
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In summary, the stirrup pants revival is an ill-conceived trend that many will find uncomfortable and unappealing, much like the memories they evoke. As we navigate these fashion cycles, it’s essential to remember that some styles are better left in the past.