Awkward Questions Expecting Moms Over 40 Get Asked

So there I was, 42 years old and pregnant, when a well-meaning acquaintance asked if my doctor had actually approved me having a baby. “I thought you were only 35! You’re older?” she continued.

“Yes, I am! If Halle Berry can do it at 46, then I can definitely manage at my age,” I replied, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. The truth is, while I received countless encouraging messages during my pregnancy—ten years after my first child was born—there were also plenty of intrusive and silly questions that left me smiling politely and nodding. At times, I even had to pretend to receive an urgent call from my nonexistent vibrating phone just to escape the onslaught of inquiries.

Honestly, I hadn’t planned on having a baby at 42, but I did, and I truly believe it was the right choice for me. Of course, people don’t want to hear that. They don’t care about the thoughtful, prayerful process of deciding to expand our family, especially if it doesn’t fit their timeline. Here’s how I wish I had responded to some of the more ridiculous questions I faced:

How did this happen?

Well, just like you and I were conceived—over a nice bottle of wine and in a classic position. Who knew conception was still the same?

You got pregnant without any fertility treatments?

This question came from everyone—from nurses to acquaintances who probably didn’t even know my last name. First off, why does it matter? Second, how about you just tell me I look great and that I’m brilliant?

Are you more exhausted than you were in your 30s?

Absolutely! I was tired before I even got pregnant. But I’m also wiser, happier, and in a better relationship now. True, sleep deprivation hits harder than it did at 32, but I’m navigating it like a champ. Plus, coffee trends are on my side!

This must be your last child, right?

Maybe, possibly. Not entirely sure. Thanks for your concern, Mom. I understand you worry about my aging body, but let’s keep those thoughts to ourselves until I’m ready to share my plans.

You’ll be HOW OLD when she starts college?

Oh, don’t worry! We’re totally signing her up for a commune in Punta Cana instead of college. We’re all about alternative education, you know?

Are you tying the knot?

The beauty of having a baby at my age is that I can say “nope” without any guilt or societal pressure.

What does your mom think?

She thinks I should not have another baby, but she is overjoyed nonetheless! She can’t wait to spoil another grandbaby and is already eyeing cute outfits on clearance.

You realize things have changed since you last had a baby, right?

Absolutely! There are now amazing gadgets, stylish clothes, and apps that make parenting easier. But the core of raising kids hasn’t changed that much. Thanks for your unsolicited advice!

Are you worried people will mistake you for her grandmother?

Honestly, I’d be more concerned if they think I’m her sister, leading her astray. But if someone thinks I’m a grandma, they can go ahead and tip off the tabloids about the oldest breastfeeding mom!

Wow. That’s awesome!

Yes, it is! I’m nurturing a tiny human! In celebration, feel free to raise a glass of champagne for us, but please, don’t suggest names—I have enough ideas of my own!

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In summary, pregnancy at an older age comes with its unique set of challenges and misconceptions. While the journey can be filled with silly questions and unsolicited advice, it’s ultimately about the love and joy a new life brings.