7 Invasive Questions I Encounter as a Single Mom

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You know what really grinds my gears? When people feel the need to pry into my life as a single mother. I mean, I don’t go around asking you about your personal life, so why is it okay for you to dig into mine? Seriously, if we haven’t chatted in years, do you really think it’s fine to send me a message on social media asking about my situation? Spoiler alert: it’s not. Let’s flip the script and see how you’d feel if I asked you similar questions.

So, what kind of things do I get asked? Buckle up.

1. You must be rolling in money from the child benefits, right? First off, it’s called Child Tax Benefit, not some magical cash cow. This funding is there to help families with the costs of raising kids and it’s determined by income—not marital status. I happen to earn a decent living, so my benefits are pretty minimal. But hey, want to talk about your finances? Just kidding, that would be rude.
2. What’s up with her dad? Oh, you want the full backstory while we’re shopping? That’s rich. It didn’t work out—simple as that. If you’re curious about the details, maybe ask him. What’s that? You don’t know him? Well, maybe it’s best if you keep your thoughts to yourself then.
3. Does her father pay child support? Let’s flip that around: how’s your credit score? What’s your salary? How much do you shell out monthly for your car? See how that crosses a line? Asking about child support is just as nosy.
4. Are you interested in dating? Sure, but let’s be real—do I have the time for that? My daughter is just a baby, and I want to soak up every moment with her. Dating is tricky enough; throw in a child, and it gets even more complicated. My time is precious, and I’m not wasting it on just anyone.
5. What’s on your daughter’s birth certificate? Just her name and date of birth, thank you very much! Anything beyond that is none of your business. When she’s old enough, she can decide who she wants to show it to.
6. Do you feel bad that your daughter doesn’t have a “normal” family? Define “normal” for me, please. While you ponder that, let me enlighten you: single-parent homes, blended families, and same-sex parent families are just as common as traditional ones. It’s 2023, people!
7. Do you want more kids? I adore kids, which is why I have one. If I’m blessed with more, fantastic! But right now, I’m not planning on having more children as a single parent. Life is unpredictable, and being a single mom is challenging enough. If more kiddos come my way, I hope my situation is different. But isn’t that obvious?

I get that some folks are just curious because they care, but others simply lack tact. Yes, my family looks different, and for some, that’s intriguing. I get it—but before you start firing off questions, consider using a little discretion.

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Summary

Being a single mother comes with its fair share of nosy questions. From inquiries about finances to assumptions about dating and family structure, it’s frustrating when people pry into personal matters. Everyone’s family looks different, and that’s perfectly okay.