By: Jamie Carter
Updated: Dec. 2, 2016
Originally Published: Oct. 8, 2015
Chores play a crucial role in childhood growth. They instill a sense of responsibility, encourage contributions to the household, and teach that life isn’t solely about pursuing your favorite activities. For my kids, chores are particularly vital; they help keep me from contemplating wild ideas like selling them to the circus when it rolls into town.
But then there are moments like this, when I open the dishwasher to find a chaotic mess that clearly shows no assistance is forthcoming.
Who do I point fingers at? After a frantic search for the usual suspects—like cartoon characters, video games, and their dad (the mastermind behind this dishwasher disaster)—I came to the realization that, as the singer Howard Jones once said, “No one ever is to blame.” Except, of course, for me, standing in a pit of frustration and disappointment, recognizing that teaching my kids how to do chores properly is yet another responsibility I’m falling short on.
This led me to a significant epiphany: Parenting often involves assigning chores to the most inept team members imaginable, with no one to hold accountable but yourself.
I had this thought while I was on my knees in the gravel, dodging spider webs clinging to my trash cans and desperately retrieving recycling from the murky depths of the green waste bin. Not surprisingly, I was trying my hardest not to curse in earshot of my neighbor. It was a struggle, let me tell you.
It reminded me of my school days. Back in elementary school, before the internet took over, we programmed a turtle to draw lines on our Apple IIe computers. This was cutting-edge tech education for the gifted class, no less!
One exercise involved “programming” a classmate to tie their shoes. The goal was to map out every step in precise detail while the “robot” would purposefully misinterpret your instructions. The takeaway? Teaching someone to tie their shoes requires meticulously crafted instructions. My realization: programming is challenging, really challenging.
This same approach is essential for guiding my children through their chores. On a side note, having kids do chores can be just as frustrating as dealing with a bunch of 12-year-olds in a computer lab back in the ‘80s.
For example, I often find myself saying things like:
- Turn the vacuum switch all the way on, or it won’t pick up anything.
- Please don’t use bathroom towels to clean the floor.
- Pledge is for tables; Windex is for windows.
- And my personal favorite: Make sure to use a new bleach wipe for the sink that’s different from the one you use for the toilet.
These are real instructions I’ve given. I had no idea my kids lacked the common sense of actual turtles!
Having grown up in a middle-class household in the Midwest, I learned that chores were part of family life. My mom didn’t hire help; she had us, and we were more than willing to pitch in. We mowed, weeded, dusted, vacuumed, and tackled all sorts of messy jobs, including cleaning the family bathroom.
Now, I’ve had a house cleaner for over a decade, which means I’m currently struggling without one. My recent move has left me on the brink of losing my sanity. Just today, I discovered something squishy at the bottom of the green waste bin that I can’t even identify by touch.
Despite this, I’m hesitant to hire a new house cleaner. I believe chores are a rite of passage. I did them, my siblings did, and my kids will too—though I’ll make sure to teach them in a way that would make my sixth-grade computer teacher proud. But first, I need to soak my fingernail in disinfectant.
If you’re interested in more about parenting and home insemination, check out this article on intracervical insemination. And for an authority on at-home insemination kits, visit Make a Mom. For those navigating pregnancy, the CDC offers excellent resources.
In summary, while assigning chores can be a source of frustration, it’s an essential part of childhood development. As parents, we must find the patience to guide our little ones, even when it feels like we’re teaching a turtle to draw.