A few years back, I found myself at a V-Day event in the suburbs of Chicago. If you’re unfamiliar, V-Day is a worldwide movement aimed at ending violence against women, with events hosted every Valentine’s Day that feature speakers and activities.
On that particular night, a young woman shared a passage from Eve Ensler’s The Vagina Monologues, beginning with the line: “You cannot love a vagina if you do not love hair.” The monologue went on to depict a woman’s experience with her husband pressuring her to remove all her pubic hair, leading to discomfort and ultimately, infidelity.
At the time, I didn’t dwell on the “love hair” sentiment, mainly because I was relieved I hadn’t brought my preteen daughter along. However, that line resonated with me, especially the recurring idea: “You have to love hair in order to love the vagina. You can’t pick the parts you want.”
Brazilian Waxes: A Trend I Just Don’t Get
And this brings me to Brazilian waxes. My first encounter with the concept came from celebrity chatter—specifically, Gwyneth Paltrow. She claimed that it was a life-changing experience, prompting me to look it up. After discovering what was involved, I quickly categorized it as another of Gwynnie’s eccentric fads.
Turns out, Brazilians are quite popular, and I honestly don’t get it.
It’s not that the thought of having hair ripped out of my labia sounds appealing—I mean, it does sound painful. But having already delivered three children through my vagina without any pain relief, I feel prepared for whatever torture I might choose to endure.
What really gets to me is the end result. First off, why would a grown woman want her vulva to resemble that of a child? That’s the first thought that crosses my mind when I think of fully removing hair down there. Sure, some Brazilians leave a “landing strip,” but I’m referring to the complete Brazilian that goes for the full eradication.
I’m not a “free the bush” advocate either; I think some grooming is sensible. But there’s a fine line for me, and I just can’t get behind the no-hair look. It feels downright strange.
The Influence of Age and Trends
Additionally, I stumbled upon a fascinating article from The Atlantic that delved into this trend, and it pointed out that my age—41—plays a role in my aversion. The hairless genitalia craze primarily captivates those under 30, particularly college students, and it’s largely driven by the adult film industry.
As if the overwhelming access to porn isn’t problematic enough, now it’s influencing women to remove all their pubic hair to achieve a look reminiscent of prepubescent girls with developed bodies? Fantastic.
Reasons for My Aversion
There are a couple more reasons why a full Brazilian gives me the shudders:
- Frugality: No way am I going to attempt this myself; I’d have to pay someone else to do it. I’m not about to shell out $50 to $100 for that kind of agony. I’d much rather invest that money in a nice massage, thank you very much.
- Privacy: I have zero interest in a stranger—who isn’t my doctor—getting that up close with my vagina. Seriously, who chooses that career? I can’t imagine spending my days yanking out people’s pubic hair. No thanks.
Lastly, I’ve noticed a glaring absence in the conversation about men and their grooming habits. Sure, some might partake in pubic hair removal, but it’s nowhere near as prevalent as it is for women. Why is it that we’re the ones expected to undergo such drastic changes to our bodies?
Everyone has their boundaries, of course. For me, there’s a significant difference between a bikini wax, where you can still wear some kind of undies, and a Brazilian, which feels like an invasion of privacy. There’s also a major distinction between tidying up and going completely bare. If you choose to go that route, it should be because you genuinely want to—not because you think it’s what makes you more desirable, clean, or attractive to your partner.
One perk of aging is that the urge to follow trends like this fades away. You do you, but I’ll be keeping my naturally mature genitalia.
If you’re interested in more topics around home insemination, check out our other blog post at intracervicalinsemination.com. For couples navigating their fertility journey, Make A Mom offers great resources. If you’re exploring pregnancy options, UCSF’s IVF page is an excellent resource to consider.
In summary, while trends come and go, my stance on maintaining a balanced approach to grooming remains unchanged.