It’s 2017, and believe it or not, we’re still debating whether it’s okay for a man to spend time alone with a woman who isn’t his wife. A recent profile of Vice President Mike Pence’s wife, Lisa, sparked a fiery discussion on social media after revealing that Pence “never dines alone with a woman other than his wife” and avoids events with alcohol unless she’s present. He also previously stated that any aide who stays late must be male. This has divided the online community, with some branding his views as sexist and others defending him as a man committed to his marriage.
For many conservative Christians, including some members of Congress, this practice is referred to as the Billy Graham Rule. The late Graham, a prominent evangelical figure, advocated for avoiding situations that could lead to temptation, insisting he would “never travel, meet, or eat alone with a woman who isn’t my wife.” A 2015 article from The Atlantic noted that female staffers for male lawmakers who adhere to this rule often miss out on private meetings, car rides, and evening functions.
While I respect the private life of Mike and Lisa Pence—who appear to have a strong and loving relationship—there are deeper issues at play with Pence’s reasoning and behavior. This type of rule reinforces outdated stereotypes that can hinder women professionally, and these stereotypes can have a negative impact on our children.
By adhering to this mindset, Pence implies that female colleagues are seen primarily as potential temptresses rather than as equals in the workplace. This suggests that men lack the self-control to interact with women without succumbing to their urges, which is both insulting and limiting to everyone involved. As a parent, I want my son to see women as equals and friends, not as sources of temptation. I also want my daughter to understand that she is more than a mere distraction in her professional environment.
Moreover, this rule creates barriers for women in male-dominated fields. Women could miss out on essential opportunities such as business dinners, private meetings, and mentorship sessions. A friend of mine who works in science pointed out, “I can’t imagine being able to do my job effectively if my boss wouldn’t meet with me one-on-one. I have performance reviews and project updates all the time.”
Additionally, treating men and women differently in professional settings might even cross legal lines. As one employment attorney noted, workplace discrimination laws prohibit unequal treatment based on gender. Another legal expert echoed this sentiment, saying, “In the U.S., gender-based double standards in professional settings can lead to discrimination claims.” While Pence might think his approach minimizes the risk of inappropriate conduct, it ultimately alienates women from valuable work experiences.
Women have faced enough discrimination in the workplace; in 2017, we should not continue to deprive them of professional opportunities because of outdated beliefs about temptation. Working women deserve better, and so do our daughters.
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In summary, Mike Pence’s refusal to meet women alone reflects outdated beliefs that can hinder women’s professional growth and perpetuate gender stereotypes. As we look toward the future, it’s essential to foster an inclusive work environment for everyone.