Occasionally, I find myself feeling adventurous and take my two boys, ages 3 and 8 months, out for an evening outing. It’s probably not the best idea, considering that this is usually the fussy time for both of them. Just yesterday, while we were heading home from the mall during rush hour, the moment we got into the car, both boys erupted into fits of screaming. Their wails were so impressive, I couldn’t help but chuckle. In that instant, I realized I was experiencing a shift in my parenting perspective.
In the past, I would have been frantically assuring them, “We’ll be home soon!” while trying to soothe my little one by reaching back to hold his hand. I often sang loudly in a futile effort to drown out the noise and speed up traffic. But yesterday, as chaos filled the car, I simply sat back and laughed—a sign that I was finally gaining some distance from the anxiety I had grown used to.
It dawned on me that perhaps I was transitioning from a novice mom to a more experienced one. The fact that I could reflect on my parenting while my boys were screaming seemed telling. Over the years, my approach to motherhood has evolved significantly since the arrival of my second child.
I’ve learned to react with less alarm. For instance, when my youngest stirs from a nap, I no longer rush to the crib as if I’m rescuing him from imminent danger. Instead, I finish what I’m doing before calmly attending to him.
I’ve also become much more at ease with crying. I now recognize that it’s a natural and essential part of parenting. I even allow my 8-month-old to cry a bit while settling down for sleep—something I would never have considered with my first child.
Conflict has become a normal aspect of parenting for me. I used to struggle with setting boundaries for my firstborn, fearing I might stifle his curiosity. Now, I understand that establishing limits is crucial for both safety and overall well-being. Regular disagreements are simply milestones of effective parenting.
Perfectionism has taken a back seat in my life. I used to be adamant about my little one’s diet, striving for an entirely organic experience. Now, I aim for a balanced lifestyle without stressing over every little detail. This extends to sunblock and bug spray; I no longer let these things consume my thoughts.
I’ve realized the importance of giving my children space to explore and play independently. I used to feel obligated to constantly engage with my baby, but now I allow them to create their own little worlds, fostering their independence.
I’ve also become more trusting and open to accepting help from others. With my first child, I was overly protective, reluctant to let anyone else hold him due to fears of germs and support. Now, I readily pass my baby to anyone willing to help, appreciating the moments I can take a breather.
Yesterday, as I was nearing my exit and acknowledging my growth as a seasoned mom, we hit a wall of traffic. The boys’ screams resumed, and I found myself second-guessing everything I’d just realized about my parenting journey.
Then, a light bulb moment occurred: I remembered I had crackers stashed in the center console! The very act of keeping snacks in the car felt like a testament to my seasoned status as a mom. I tossed some crackers to my baby without hesitation, and they worked their magic. We made it home with minimal fuss, and amid the noise, I was able to laugh instead of panic. I knew everything would be alright, even if they sounded like they were in distress.
If you’re navigating your own parenting journey, be sure to check out some helpful resources such as Kindbody for insights on pregnancy and home insemination, and Make a Mom for expert advice on home insemination kits. This can help you along your path to becoming a seasoned parent, just like I am.
Summary
In this reflection on motherhood, Jamie Reed shares her transformation from a nervous new mom to a more seasoned parent. Through experiences with her two sons, she recounts the changes in her reactions to crying, conflict, and the importance of accepting help. A humorous moment during a chaotic car ride highlights her growth, reminding her that parenting doesn’t have to be perfect to be fulfilling.