Turning twelve might not seem like a big deal, but it truly is a pivotal age. The range of changes children experience during this final year of preteen life is astonishing. Reflecting on my own twelfth year, I remember it as a time of profound transformation. While my kids face different challenges in their own era, they are sure to experience their own set of thrills and struggles as they look back on this year.
It doesn’t feel like it was that long ago when I was navigating my own adolescence, filled with confusion and the belief that I’d never figure out how to shave properly. The first semester found me in seventh grade—was it a middle school or a seventh-grade center? By summer’s end, I was preparing for eighth grade at a proper junior high, feeling incredibly grown-up.
The person I was at the start of that year was worlds apart from who I had become by year’s end. At the beginning, I was a flute player, and by the end, I had shared my first kiss—neither experience quite matched the hype! Initially, my classmates called me Bubbles, a nod to my bubbly personality. By the end, they had affectionately dubbed me Charlie Brown due to my resemblance to the Peanuts character and my quirky behavior.
I began the year sporting a feather in my hair until the principal banned such accessories. By year’s end, I found myself chewing on cinnamon toothpicks, only to discover that they too were deemed inappropriate, as they supposedly sparked hallucinations. It was at that moment I learned that school wasn’t exactly a place for joy.
Fashion-wise, I started with parachute pants and oversized shoulder pads. By the end, I was rocking blue eyeshadow and questioning why I felt so isolated. My twelfth year kicked off with me lacking any curves and indulging in milkshakes made with raw eggs while trying out “Increase My Bust” exercises. Spoiler alert: no changes occurred.
I couldn’t put down Judy Blume’s Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret at the start of the year. By the end, I was engrossed in Forever—and still pondering my solitude. Initially, I was afraid to be home alone. By the end, I was babysitting the neighbor’s kids and paying them to stay out of my hair.
Musically, I transitioned from loving Golden Earring and Lionel Richie to being obsessed with Duran Duran and U2. I rode my bike everywhere, but soon I was tagging along with my friend Jenna’s older sister, who had a knack for crafting dresses from garbage bags. I went from family movie nights watching On Golden Pond to sneaking in late-night viewings of 48 Hours with my friend Sarah.
I started the year experimenting with Yves St. Laurent menthol cigarettes, eventually moving on to Camels, convinced that I was now a rebel. I wished for my dad to be out of my life, and by the end of the year, he had distanced himself. Sleepovers were prohibited at first, but soon I was engaging in the latest trends, like popping bras into the freezer overnight.
My thoughts began to deepen as the year progressed; I filled diary pages with my musings, moving away from my parents’ music to discovering the world of alternative tunes. Friends I barely remembered faded as school let out, but by the end, I had met those who would shape my future.
As I support my children through their own transformations, it’s helpful to glance back three decades and appreciate just how drastically I changed during that pivotal year.
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In summary, the journey through age twelve is filled with significant shifts, from identity and friendships to passions and fears. Each child’s experience is unique, but the common thread of transformation binds them all.