Growing up in a conservative household, I often felt like a “late bloomer.” My upbringing, steeped in traditional values, set me on a path that felt distinctly different from my peers. While many kids were indulging in pizza parties and video games, my childhood was defined by a strict regime, where nail polish was out of the question and organized sports were off-limits. Indeed, my parents had a firm grip on what I could and couldn’t do.
Long before being a vegetarian became trendy, I was dining on meat alternatives with quirky names like “Big Franks” and “Stripples.” I was that kid who ordered a hamburger without the meat at family restaurants. My first encounter with an actual hot dog didn’t happen until my twenties, and I discovered the joys of pepperoni only then. Who knew unclean meat could taste so good?
In my world, drinking, swearing, and jewelry were forbidden. I grew up without pierced ears, and my family led a very modest lifestyle. Television was limited, and movies were often off the table, leaving me somewhat oblivious to pre-2000 pop culture references. I’ve never seen classics like Ferris Bueller’s Day Off or Sixteen Candles. My parents were meticulous about my media consumption, believing that everything we take in impacts our minds and hearts. Maybe they were right, but it still frustrated me to miss out on shows like The Smurfs.
As I navigate my own parenting journey, I often recall how my mother never uttered a curse word, a standard I sometimes struggle to meet. Yet, her example reminds me that it’s possible to raise children without losing one’s cool. They demonstrated what healthy relationships look like, and I now realize how blessed I was to grow up in a secure and happy home. Their conservative approach also allowed me the freedom to make my own choices. I didn’t recognize the peculiarity of my upbringing until later, but it didn’t hinder my happiness. I built my confidence through adventurous explorations in the woods near our home, armed only with my imagination and our loyal German shepherd.
By the age of seven, I was canoeing solo on the lake, scaling trees, and racing through the woods on my bike. My parents didn’t hover; they encouraged breathing space. They observed from a distance, allowing me to explore, make mistakes, and learn from the consequences. Shielded from outside influences, I developed an inner strength that I carry with me today, one that is shaped not by popular opinion but by my own experiences.
When I began dating, my experiences were far from conventional. Even when I considered marrying someone my parents didn’t approve of, they allowed me the freedom to make that decision. Although I didn’t end up marrying that person, I appreciated my parents’ restraint in letting me figure things out for myself. They understood that effective parenting doesn’t equate to control; attempts to dominate often lead to rebellion. Instead, their thoughtful guidance equipped me with the tools to make sound decisions.
As a typical late bloomer, I only mastered makeup application well into adulthood, but I did learn, and that’s what matters. I hope to protect my own children’s innocence and cherish their childhood without rushing them. Except for eyebrow plucking, that might need to be expedited!
While my values have evolved since becoming a parent myself, I have gained the ability to filter out outside noise and follow what I believe is right. My intuition, cultivated through years of listening to my inner voice, guides me in my decisions.
Ultimately, my upbringing taught me that being “different” isn’t a bad thing at all.
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Summary
Growing up with strict parents presented unique challenges, from a limited diet to a sheltered lifestyle, but it ultimately granted me a different kind of freedom. I learned to navigate life on my own terms, cultivating inner strength through exploration and self-discovery. While my upbringing was unconventional, it gifted me with the tools to make informed choices as I now raise my own children.