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Late-Night Dad Quotes
“Wait till you hear this!”
From the other room, our son chimed in: “You’re gonna be in trouble if you say that, Dad!” -
Conversations About Parties We’re Skipping
Really? We aren’t driving two hours for a potluck where we’ll just stand around eating chips with strangers? No thanks. -
Tales from Our College Days
“Mom, what’s a beer bong?”
“Oh, it’s a, um, a fancy drink holder! You know, like a vase for drinks?”
“And what’s a, um, ‘bong’?”
“It’s like a small, um, percussion instrument! Who wants dessert?” -
Parenting Disagreements
Yikes. My partner and I usually see eye to eye on raising our kids, but sometimes we don’t. It feels uncomfortable, and I hate the idea of them feeling caught in the middle. Sorry, kiddos, we’ll do better! -
Secrets and Gossip
You cannot tell anyone what I just whispered to you about your dad, OK? Seriously, it’s our little secret. Yes, I’ll bribe you with cookies. -
Mom’s Unintended Noises
Nothing cracks a 9-year-old up more than the sound of their mom breaking wind—disturbing and hilarious all at once! -
Chatting About Their Day
I know I shouldn’t do it, but when they’re asleep, it’s hard not to share the funny, cute, and bizarre things they do. Go to bed already so we can talk about how cute you are! -
The Truth About Santa and Mermaids
I try to keep the magic alive while avoiding the embarrassment of them being teased. My daughter asked if mermaids exist, and I thought she could handle the truth. I said, “Nope!” then remembered my son was listening. He was shocked: “But we saw them at the aquarium!” -
My First Words After My Partner Comes Home
It usually sounds like, “Chaos! Need a drink! Cleanup on aisle five!” -
Heavy Topics
Discussions about cremation, embalming, or political figures can be daunting and often lead to genuine fears about the future for my kids.
These are just a few of the slightly embarrassing things my children have overheard. I hope they don’t remember the time they heard us “wrestling” and thought it was something scary. Let’s just forget that one, sweetie. Trust me.
For more insightful parenting tips, check out this blog post. And for those interested in home insemination, Make A Mom offers a fantastic resource. If you’re looking for information on pregnancy and fertility, Cleveland Clinic’s OB-GYN Time podcast is definitely worth a listen!
In summary, parenting is filled with moments that can be a bit cringe-worthy, but they often lead to laughter and growth. Embrace the chaos, and remember, we’re all in this together!