Recently, I had a rather surreal moment as a parent. My kids and I were at the kitchen table, casually listening to the news while snacking on graham crackers, when my preschooler and toddler started to hit each other. As their mom, I often find myself breaking up their playful skirmishes. “Hey, no hitting!” I called out. “We don’t hit our brothers.”
Just then, the unmistakable voice of Donald Trump, the Republican nominee for president, boomed from the radio: “I was gonna hit this guy so hard, his head would spin,” referring to a speaker at the Democratic National Convention. In a flash, I turned off the radio, desperate to shield my pleas for sibling harmony from his inflammatory rhetoric.
This is the reality of parenting in the era of Donald Trump—teaching our children the importance of kindness and respect while simultaneously witnessing a prominent public figure embody the opposite. It’s a familiar challenge. I remind my kids to avoid name-calling, even though one of the presidential candidates has famously labeled his opponents with derogatory nicknames like “Lyin’ Ted” and “Crooked Hillary.” While I stress the value of respect, I can’t help but glance at the TV where Trump is ridiculing a disabled reporter.
A major party’s presidential candidate isn’t held to the same standards of decency that I expect from my 2- and 3-year-olds—be compassionate, speak kindly, and never hit. This behavior goes beyond just making headlines; it seeps into the very fabric of our children’s understanding of social interaction. While we may believe we can protect our kids from society’s harsh realities, they are more perceptive than we realize. They catch snippets of radio broadcasts, catch sight of press conferences, and overhear our discussions about the election.
Adults might be able to navigate Trump’s divisive language and dismiss the theatrics to discern his messages, but children are more likely to take his inflammatory comments literally. The consequences can be serious. Earlier this year, in a local school, a mother reported that her third-grade son was bullied by classmates who told him he would be deported if Trump won. The more negativity they hear, the more likely they are to repeat it.
Even if Trump doesn’t win the presidency, the impact of his incendiary language will likely linger long after Election Day, which worries me more as a parent than as a citizen. He has already suggested that the election could be rigged and has hinted at potential violence if he loses, creating an atmosphere that will inevitably trickle down from the political arena to the playground.
It’s important to acknowledge that Trump resonates with many who feel marginalized in today’s shifting economy. They need representation, and he has become their voice. However, we’ve also seen how he reacts to those who disagree with him, such as when he insulted a grieving mother of a fallen soldier. If this is how he responds to someone facing unimaginable loss, how can we expect him to empathize with the struggles of the unemployed factory worker, the parent who can’t afford safe childcare, or the student burdened by college debt? Even when he addresses minority issues, I often turn off the radio, fearful that my children may echo his heated language on the playground.
For now, my kids remain blissfully unaware of the political landscape, opting instead for wrestling matches in the living room. While I welcome a little roughhousing, we have our ground rules: no horse-collar tackles, no face-hitting, no wrestling without consent, and absolutely no kicking someone when they’re down. Yet, day after day during this election cycle, we witness Trump disregarding these fundamental principles of decency, mercilessly mocking anyone who stands in his way.
Whoever emerges victorious this fall will play a crucial role in my children’s transition from home to preschool and eventually to elementary school, where they will learn about our nation’s founding principles of freedom, justice, and equal opportunity. I worry whether the lessons taught in classrooms will align with the behavior they see around them, or if disdain will become the norm, rendering tales of tolerance and acceptance as relics of a bygone era.
This election is more than just a choice for our next president; it’s a decision about the kind of discourse we expect from our leaders. We must determine whether the values we instill in our children—treating each other with kindness and recognizing the weight of our words and actions—are merely lessons for compliance or the foundation for them to grow into responsible members of society. If it’s the latter, we cannot endorse the behavior exhibited by Donald Trump.
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In summary, as parents, we find ourselves navigating a complex landscape influenced by prominent figures like Donald Trump, striving to teach our children values of kindness and respect while countering the harsh realities of political discourse that can undermine these lessons. The choices we make today will shape not only the future of our country but also the moral framework within which our children grow.