I have three kids, but right now it feels like there are a whole troop of them running around my home, devouring the snacks I just bought. My daughter has Taylor Swift blasting in her room while my son and his buddy are lifting weights in the basement, making more noise than a herd of elephants. They keep begging for more friends to come over, more food, and they’re even asking if they can launch YouTube channels. To put it simply, they are slowly wearing me down.
Just the other day, my son had a friend over all day, and as soon as he left, we headed out to run some errands. Not even minutes after parting ways, my son started texting another buddy, only to find out he was just a few miles behind us. “Mom, can we stop? Jake is right behind us! He can join us for errands and then spend the night. Maybe we can grab ice cream!”
No, no he can’t. Because this mama has reached her limit for socializing today, and I desperately need some alone time.
All three of my kids are extroverted, and I’m completely drained. While I enjoy social time, I also need my moments of solitude to recharge. I can listen, cuddle, and read all day long, but there’s a point where I’m done. My kids, however, could chat on the phone all night and wake up ready to party with friends the next day, continuing this cycle without pause. I’ve even tried to outlast them socially, hoping they’d slow down a bit, but it backfired spectacularly.
They came into this world as little socialites. Sure, they’ve had quieter phases, and my teenage son often retreats to his room to escape me, but they’ve always thrived on social interactions and keeping their schedules packed. In bustling cities, they soak up the vibrant energy and crowds, while I feel like a deflated balloon in need of a nap. They thrive in the chaos, whereas I just need a quiet corner.
Don’t get me wrong—I’m thrilled they have the confidence to meet new people and enjoy life. Most of the time, it’s wonderful. But I often find myself playing the role of the “fun police,” reluctantly saying “no” for my own sanity. My home can’t be a constant party, and I can’t be everyone’s chauffeur.
As a classic introvert, I require downtime to recharge, and I can’t be the mother I aspire to be when I’m always on-call for everyone else’s kids. Trying to keep my composure, while curbing my swearing and managing to avoid yelling at my kids while devouring cake over the sink—braless—is no small feat. I need a break.
I want to support their social needs while also taking care of my own, without making them feel ashamed of their extroverted nature. This can be a delicate balance, especially since I often say “yes” to their social events out of guilt. When I finally need a breather and turn down playdates or gatherings, they aren’t exactly thrilled with me. It’s a tough concept for them to grasp, just as it is for me to comprehend their endless desire for social engagement.
I’ve birthed three Energizer bunnies, while I need at least six cups of coffee and a solid ten hours of sleep to keep up. So for now, I aim to embrace their vibrant social lives, maintain a fully stocked fridge of caffeine, and learn to say no every now and then. Because while it’s vital for my kids to be happy, it’s equally important for me to find my own happiness too.
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Summary:
Raising three extroverted children can be exhausting for an introverted mom. While she supports their social endeavors, she struggles to find a balance between their needs and her own need for solitude. Embracing their vibrant social lives, she learns the importance of saying no and prioritizing her well-being, all while keeping the fridge stocked with caffeine.