Important: If you find yourself in a similar situation, it’s crucial to contact your healthcare provider immediately, as this could indicate a serious medical issue, including a pregnancy or postpartum stroke.
The labor was quite challenging. While I can’t compare it to others, the exhaustion was palpable—especially for my partner. Our daughter arrived at 42 weeks, right at the threshold. The doctors decided to induce labor since we couldn’t wait any longer. From the onset of the first contractions to the actual delivery, nearly 48 hours passed.
At one point, the nurse ruptured the membranes, which only amplified the discomfort. After struggling to dilate, my partner chose to receive an oxytocin injection and opted for an epidural. She remained on it for 9 hours. Toward the end, her temperature began to rise, indicating a possible infection. I felt a wave of anxiety wash over me, and I prayed for her well-being. After discussions with the doctors, they ultimately opted for a C-section. A sense of relief washed over us; after all that, she had only reached 4 centimeters of dilation, whereas 10 was necessary to start pushing.
On the second day in the hospital, it was the afternoon, and my partner was desperate for rest. She hadn’t had the chance to sleep much, with the baby crying and the bustling hospital schedule. She managed to doze off for about 3 hours. Naturally, our daughter grew hungry. My partner was breastfeeding, so I decided to gently wake her. As she sat up in bed, I placed the baby in her lap, but something seemed off. She just stared blankly at the baby and me, seemingly frozen.
“Sweetheart, are you alright?” I asked.
After a long pause, she began to cry softly. It was as if she was looking at a stranger. She couldn’t recall our baby, her surroundings, or even my name. Although she started breastfeeding, she seemed unaware of what she was doing.
It was terrifying. I feared that this state might persist and wondered about the implications. Should I call the doctors? The thought crossed my mind, but I hesitated, worrying whether they would deem us unfit to care for our child. I didn’t reach out to the medical team, and fortunately, in about 5 to 10 minutes, she regained her composure. What had happened? Was it merely pregnancy brain?
Pregnancy Brain
Beyond physical changes such as a growing belly and swelling, there are also mental and psychological transformations. New mothers often experience forgetfulness, reduced mental sharpness, and memory lapses—commonly referred to as pregnancy brain or momnesia. A study from 2016 confirmed that pregnant women can experience a reduction in grey matter in the brain, starting as early as the first trimester and lasting up to two years postpartum.
A surge in hormones may explain these changes. “During pregnancy, there can be 15 to 40 times more progesterone and estrogen in the brain,” notes Dr. Louann Brizendine, director of the Women’s Mood and Hormone Clinic at the University of California, San Francisco. “These hormones influence various neurons in the brain. By the time of delivery, significant amounts of oxytocin are released, which not only helps the uterus contract and stimulates milk production but also impacts brain function.”
It’s vital to emphasize that these changes shouldn’t be used to argue that new mothers are less capable in professional settings. These effects are usually temporary, and cognitive ability remains intact. Nature simply prioritizes tasks related to caring for a newborn over trivial matters like remembering where the keys are.
Final Thoughts
To this day, we are unsure what truly happened; my partner hasn’t experienced anything like it since. It could have been pregnancy brain, particularly since she received additional oxytocin during labor. In rare cases, forgetfulness post-pregnancy might indicate an ischemic stroke, which is extremely serious.
Moreover, in general, sleep deprivation—something my partner faced—can lead to cognitive dullness; she believes that might have been the case for her. However, we never consulted the doctors about that episode, which we now realize was a mistake. There’s always a risk of more serious conditions, and it should never be disregarded. As we plan for a second child, we aim to be better prepared if something similar arises. We’ve learned a lot since then.
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