4 Sneaky Ways to Handle Your Judgmental Babysitter at 1 a.m.

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Let’s face it, your babysitter is probably cooler than you. She’s got those trendy glasses that you’ve only read about online, and she casually drops references to brands you’ve never heard of. As she sizes you up, you can’t help but feel a bit self-conscious about your outfit. She strolls in with her laptop, claiming she doesn’t know how to work your fancy television setup. Seriously? You’ve got a treasure trove of shows on demand. Isn’t she missing out on the latest episodes of Succession or The Crown?

As the night winds down, you’re left with the familiar anxiety of trying to appear composed after a few too many glasses of wine. If you’re anything like my partner and me, you’re shocked at how expensive this whole babysitting gig is. You might even consider moonlighting as a babysitter yourself; it seems like an easy way to make a few extra bucks, right? But as you fumble with your keys and prepare to face your babysitter, you can’t shake off the cringe-worthy memories of sneaking home as a teenager.

So, how do you gracefully navigate this potentially awkward encounter? Here are a few tips to ensure your babysitter vacates without judging your late-night decisions:

1. Pre-Arrange a Cab: Before you head out, casually ask if she’d like you to call her a taxi when you’re heading home. This way, when you return, she can scoot out quickly and avoid that painful wait where you both make small talk. Nobody wants to be stuck in that awkward moment of pretending everything is totally fine.
2. Designate a Speaker: Agree in advance who’s going to do the talking when you return. If you leave it to chance, both you and your partner might end up babbling nervously, making it even more uncomfortable. One of you can handle the pleasantries while the other discreetly hands over her payment for the night of babysitting.
3. Stay Fully Dressed: Guys, listen up! Do not remove your shoes or belt or anything else while she’s still there, especially if you missed the first tip and are stuck waiting for her cab. You don’t want her to recount your disheveled state to her friends later. Trust me, it’s not a good look.
4. Embrace Your Flaws: Consider humorously acknowledging how “flammable” you are after a few drinks. It might lighten the mood, and who knows? She might even appreciate your honesty about the situation. Plus, you’ve successfully booked this sought-after sitter for next weekend!

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In summary, while navigating the world of babysitters and late-night outings can be tricky, a little preparation goes a long way. So relax and enjoy your night out, because you deserve it!